PANDAS (Pediatric Autoimmune Neuropsychiatric Disorder Associated with Streptococcal Infections)

The last several years I have been a mother worried sick about her Mr. Man and his "mental illness".  Now I am a mother with a huge amount of hope.  Why?  Let me explain.


When my son hit about 3-4 he became a "cautious" child.  He was happy and he wasn't generally difficult but he had some quirks.  He hated loud noises most of all.  Things he had been around before began to really upset him, like fireworks and flushing the toilet.  My husband is a bit sound sensitive so we just figured that was the reason.  


By Kindergarten he wasn't happy anymore, he was just plain angry.  After a horrid Christmas season that left me in tears much of the time I made an appointment with his pediatrician.  His teacher had suggested, OK insisted, that I have him tested for ADHD.  Because this runs in the family, I did.  Our wonderful doctor knew right away that it wasn't ADHD, it was anxiety.  And or course, once I heard that, I knew he was right.  We met with a therapist once and she didn't feel like he needed ongoing therapy.  Putting a label on it helped me deal with it.


First grade was better.  He had a teacher he liked a lot better (and who liked him a whole lot better as well).  He got strep a few times (what kid doesn't).  I asked about his tonsils because they looked big to me but his doctor said he didn't want to jump the gun.  I felt like he was doing soooo much better.  He was still "cautious" but he wasn't angry anymore.  I chalked it up to a better school year.  Christmas was still difficult.  He was so worried he hadn't been good enough for Santa to come.  I told him Santa knew his heart was good and that all little boys were naughty sometimes.


The summer after 1st grade he was going to Summer Camp.  He started saying some things every once in a while that made me thing "OCD" but I didn't want to over react, so I just figured it went with the anxiety.  He started second grade and the first few weeks were really hard.  He was angry again.  He had a great teacher who was very strict, but also very consistent and he liked that, even though he was in trouble quite a bit.  She felt he had a "chip on his shoulder".  I knew his anxiety was getting worse.  I kept trying to explain to her through out the year about his anxiety issues.  She just thought he needed more discipline.

By late autumn I started to notice a few more quirks that had me worried.  He began putting his garbage can outside of his room every day.  He would tell me he just couldn't play with it in his room.  One day he began shaking his head while he was watching TV.  I asked him what he was doing.  He said that he had to shake his head whenever he could see a garbage can to make sure that "the color would stay in the world".  I walked out of the room and began to sob.  In December my mom had been watching him and told me that he had told her he felt like he had put his finger by his bum and then felt like he "had" to lick it.  This obviously had her concerned.  I mentioned my OCD fears and knew that I had to do something about it.  Christmas was a little better because we made everyone stop the "you better be good or Santa won't come" bit.  He was still getting strep quite often. 

In February we started seeing a psychiatrist.  She mentioned having his strep titers measured because of PANDAS.  I looked it up, saw that the treatment was the same as for regular OCD and figured it didn't matter if it was caused by strep or not.  She had him do some Exposure and Response therapy regarding the garbage and it seemed to do the trick.  I also mentioned he constantly pushed his stomach in and out.  She just wanted him to focus on that (mindfulness) when he realized he was doing it.  By summer he had pretty much quit.  He seemed to be doing so much better she suggested we wait until Fall to see her again if we needed to.


Summer was fairly uneventful for him.  My other son was having some gastrointestinal issues and I was spending my energy there.


3rd grade started with him angry and mean again.  I began to wonder if it was just how he felt about starting school, even though he always seemed excited to start school again.  He promptly caught strep a few more times.  His teacher was OK, but I was grateful he had her because she didn't give much work and her husband's children both had OCD, so she knew what we were up against and was pretty understanding.  We started seeing a new therapist that we really liked, though I wasn't so confident he knew much about OCD.  But things continued to go up and down.  By October his doctor felt he needed his tonsils out.  I agreed.  I wondered if his HUGE tonsils were why he didn't sleep well at night.  I couldn't believe he was still sleeping on our floor every night.  I had hoped he would grow out of it.  We made an appointment with an ENT.  The day prior to his appt. he told me his throat felt weird.  I just knew it was strep again so I took him out of school to be tested.  Yep.  Another round of amoxicillan.


The day after that we met with the ENT.  I mentioned the strep.  He looked in his ears and nose and said that he also had 2 ear infections and a sinus infection.  He switched the antibiotic and said to schedule the tonsillectomy.  His tonsils were horrid.


He had his operation the week prior to Thanksgiving so he wouldn't miss much school.  He did really well.  Much better than I had expected.  I seriously had thought we'd have to sedate him to get him there.  But he did great.  After the operation he had another round of amoxicillan and seemed good to go.  Our Christmas was wonderful.  We couldn't figure out exactly why but figured it was because we had started making him go to bed earlier.  He also began sleeping through the night.  


School started up again and he was still alternating between good times and hard times.  I figured that it just the way it was.  We decided to start him on Zoloft.  We couldn't quite tell if it was helping, but were hopeful.  By Summer he was doing really well and we again decided not to continue therapy through the summer.  I had asked his pediatrician about some odd behaviors that I thought seemed more like tics than OCD.  He wondered if I should see a neurologist.


4th grade started and he was actually a bit a happier than usual.  Until the second week and his OCD went nuts and his behaviors became obvious tics and were multiplying.  And then his brother mentioned that he felt like he had a bubble in the back of his throat while we were at the grocery store one day.  I decided to walk over to the Express Clinic in the store and have him tested for strep. I could tell the nurse thought I was nuts but it came back positive.  I wondered if there was a correlation to the OCD and tics worsening.  He placed in the low math and middle reading classes which really surprised me.  He'd always been in the high classes.  The teacher showed me his paper and remarked that his handwriting was awful.  It had been awful since first grade.  I had him tested for a learning disability but it came back in the normal range.


In October we met with the doctor again.  I mentioned the increase in compulsions and tics.  He said he'd treated little girl with PANDAS before.  He took a throat culture and it came back negative.  I figured that meant it wasn't.  Somewhere in my mind I thought somehow they were related but I didn't know how.  I also realized the Zoloft was making him fat and manic.  I began to slowly taper him off and have noticed zero difference in the OCD or tics.


His tics and behaviors continued to seesaw.  In late December 2010 I was at the library and I saw a book called Saving Sammy by Beth Maloney.  Being about a boy with OCD, I checked it out.  As I read his story things began to click. 


PANDAS means that their bodies have produced antibodies to the strep infection like they should.  But then something goes wrong and those antibodies begin attacking their basal ganglia, causing OCD, tics and ADHD.  Because it is the antibodies causing the problem, the child can have a reaction to just being around someone else who is carrying the strep bacteria.  The reaction causes their body to produce more antibodies and this produces worsening behaviors.  As the reaction subsides, the behaviors generally let up, at least some.  Sammy had an awful case and suffered a year before his mother started to piece together what was going on.  A wonderful doctor, Dr. Nicolaides in New Jersey put him on long term antibiotics and he slowly got better over the course of several years.


After I devoured the book in one sitting, I started doing more and more research and realized that there are doctors and researchers who believe the antibiotics are the key.  The NIMH still does not recommend antibiotic treatment for PANDAS, even though children are getting better when using them.


I immediately called our pediatrician.  We went to see him last week and I presented my case.  He agreed to give him a 10 day course of Augmentin.  I am keeping a detailed journal of our days.  I can only hope that it helps.  I think I can see some improvements already.  He had red dye #40 today, which ALWAYS leads to increased tics.   Today it doesn't seem to have affected him the usual way.  Not everything is gone, but it seems better.


Wouldn't it be amazing if a lot of the pediatric onset cases of OCD and/or Tourettes ends up being a reaction to common strep that can be treated?  I am so amazed that doctors actually figured this all out!  I'm also amazed at the things that are out there that we just don't know about until it happens to our child.  I wonder how many kids suffer with this who don't have parents that research like crazy how to heal them.  It makes me sad to think about.

Do I know for sure Mr. Man has PANDAS?  No.  Do I think he does.  I really do.  He fits the profile and his case history seems to be pretty typical of PANDAS patients.  As we move through this puzzle I am determined to get the word out.  People need to know about this! 

All Your Worth by Elizabeth Warren and Amelia Warren Tyagi is my all time favorite financial book.  Now if you know me at all, you know that I read a lot of non-fiction, mostly in the areas of finances, parenting, decorating, organizing and living your best life.   

Why is this my favorite finance self-help book of all time, you ask?  Well, I guess because it just plain makes sense.  The authors have looked at the big picture, distilled it down to the root causes and come up with a one size fits all, easy to understand, easy to follow plan that will get you through your life from cradle to grave.  How amazing is that!?!

The premise of the book is simple.  Life requires balance.  Get out of balance and things get funky.  Work your way back to being and balance and life gets pretty easy and enjoyable.  Balance is the case of money is having enough money for each of three categories: must-haves, savings and wants.  Go heavy on one area and you automatically throw off the other areas.  Stay in balance and financial success is pretty much a sure thing.  The balance they suggest isn't arbitrary.  It is based on research as well as common sense and they fully explain the reasoning behind it and the consequences of not following it.  They don't tell you what is important, they leave that up to you.  They don't have an ideology that you have to subscribe to.  There is no guilt and no preaching.  You get to decide what is important and what your own financial ideology is.  You just need to keep it in balance.  



First things first; Must-Haves.  They recommend your Must-Have be at 50% if your take home pay.  They are pretty specific on what constitutes a must-have.  It's something that is necessary for basic human health, safety and dignity.  It is something you would still spend your money on even if you lost your job.  It includes things you are obligated by contract to pay as well.  The list is fairly short and sweet: housing including basic utilities & homeowners or renters insurance, your transportation costs including gas, insurance and a payment, basic medical costs including insurance, life insurance, disability insurance and long term care insurance, a certain amount for basic food, and anything you have signed a contract to pay for, such as student loans, cell phones, a gym membership or furniture, as well as child support and alimony.  Aren't clothes a need?  Well, truly, most people could get by for quite some time with what they already have.  At least 3-6 months.  What about debt payments.  Well we'll get to that in a minute.


What if you have more than 50% in must-haves, like Family currently does?  Then it is time to start trimming.  Not your wants.  It might work for a little while, but eventually you burn out.  You need to work at getting you Must-Haves to 50% or you really don't have much of a chance long term.  Re-shop your insurance.  Can you turn things you are renting back in? 

In our case, our biggest Must-Have expense is what throws us out of balance; our house.  We don't have car payments.  Our cars are older so our insurance costs are quite low.  We don't have anything purchased on time.  We aren't renting anything.  We have too much house.  But we aren't moving.  So we have to find someplace to trim.  For now it is groceries.  We have a lot of food storage built up so for the next few months we are going to try to keep grocery costs to a bare minimum.  But that isn't a long term solution and I know it.  So, if you can't or won't trim your Must-Haves much lower, you have to make more.  Basically, I've got to get a job that at least covers the difference between what our Must-Haves are and what they should be.  Since I've got both kiddos in school full-time, I think that is doable.


The second part of the equation is Savings.  Savings should be at 20%.  Inevitably the question always come up of whether one should build their emergency fund first or pay off existing debts first.  There is a lot of debate in the financial community about this. The authors go the route of Dave Ramsey.  Save $1000 for emergencies first.  This should cover things like a broken washing machine or needing new tires. Then take any existing savings and your monthly 20% and throw it at your consumer debt until it is paid off.  If you end up using your $1000, replenish it with your 20% and get going on the debt again. Most people if they get really serious, and quit amassing any new debt, will pay things off faster than they imagined possible.  It takes a major commitment and focus on the end result though.


Once the debt is vanquished (love that word) the 20% should go to building up a larger emergency fund of 3-6  months Must-Have Expenses.  More if you want or are self-employed.  I think for Family V 9-12 months is a better goal.  The real estate market is still pretty topsy-turvy.  Better to be on the safe side.


After you have amassed your emergency fund it is time to diversify a bit.  10% to retirement, 5% to paying off a house if you have one and 5% towards your dreams, such as major vacations, kid's college funds, going back to school yourself, a Porche 911 Turbo, whatever floats your boat.

They do go into how to invest as well but I won't get into that here.  Like the rest of the book, it is simple as logical.



The last 30% is for Wants.  Wants are what make life worth living.  Wants are what keep you putting your 20% toward your future.  Wants are important and shouldn't be short-changed.  But Wants can't be anymore than 30%.  Wants are cable TV, DSL, clothes, music & karate lessons, electronics, jewelry, vacations, food over and above a basic necessity to live & stay healthy etc.  They may be so important you are tempted to call them Must-Haves, but if you would ultimately cut them if things got really tight, it's a Want.  Mr. Man's karate lessons are expensive and they are also very important to him and therefore to me.  They keep him fit, increase his self-esteem and teach him great values.  But if we had to, we could do without them for a while.  That makes them a Want.  


Some people are heavy on the Wants.  Some people are heavy on the Must-Haves.  Either way you are out of balance and need to do what it takes to get your finances back into alignment.


The most obvious thing about getting yourself back on track is to stop incurring ANY new debt.  Otherwise you may as well just forget it.  For me this is going to require going to using cash for our everyday expenditures.  I find swiping a card, even a debit card to be too convenient.  Usually I don't even know what the total was, I just swipe and go on my merry way.  By counting out the money and watching my stash dwindle I am forced to really thing about spending wisely.  They also recommend having some totally FREE money to quell arguments and give each person in the family some freedom.  It doesn't have to be much but it does have to be no questions asked money that isn't accounted for in the budget.  It goes without saying that it comes from your Wants category.  For R and I, we've agreed on $20 a week for each of us.  This is enough for lunch out or a pair of earrings but not so much that it will throw us off track.


If you are looking for common sense answers to how to handle your money, I highly recommend this book.  It pretty much has it all.  Like most couples, our biggest source of contention is money.  We are optimistic that following this program will address all of our concerns, thus ending the money arguments.  This will most certainly benefit the whole family and improve our marriage.  Can't go wrong there, no?


Read it.  Love it.  Live it.

 

Marvelous Mr. Man

Mr. Man.  What can I say about this kid.  He's handsome, brilliant, funny, anxious, enthusiastic, and can be sooooo hard to parent.  Mr. Man only knows how to do things one way, full ON. Intense is a HUGE understatement. (By the way, he hated the school program in this picture more than anything because they had to be Mer-People and at 4 years old he had already decided that was waaaayyyy too girly for him.)  

He reads like you can't believe.  He finished all 7 Harry Potter books in less than a year.  At school they can take AR tests, which test for comprehension and award the student points based on difficulty of the book and how they do on the test.  Harry Potter 6 had something like 45 points, one of the hardest on the list, and he scored 44.  Last year he won the award for most AR points.  I was really proud of him.

He's super sensitive.  He has a huge heart and is really compassionate toward animals.  Here he is showing me a ladybug on the beach in Costa Rica.  He worries about the health and safety of our pets maybe a little too much.  He gets really upset during kids movies about animals during the obligatory part where the bad guy is being mean to the animal.  R and I have to remind him-it's only 

                                      a movie!

Here he is 2 years later in Costa Rica holding some sort of sea creature he found on the beach.  He has a lot of anxiety in some areas of his life, yet in others he's really adventurous and brave.  You can see by the look on his face how excited, yet freaked out he his.  Every time this kid tries something new, I am thrilled.  But when he goes for something, he goes full force which can freak me out.  It took him several years to work his way up through the roller coaster type rides at Lagoon, but this last year, not only did he ride Wicked, which I think is terrifying, but he jumped on Blast-Off and Re-entry without a second thought, which I refuse to do.  He's a nut on his bike, 4 wheeler and snowboard.  It's when he isn't in control that his anxiety starts to surface.  But he works through it, and when he does I appreciate how strong his spirit is. 

There's a moose behind him in this picture.  Zoltar is totally unfazed, but Mr. Man is not sure what the hell his parents are doing!  Which I think is his main sentiment regarding R and myself as his parents.  He's one of those kids that is sure he knows at least as much as we do, and he may be right when it comes to the facts, but it is impossible to convince him that experience begets wisdom, and we might just have a little more of that than he does.  He just thinks we are old which means our brains are already deteriorating so we couldn't possibly know better than he.  

He's not much a team sports kid, but he does love individual pursuits, like snowboarding, surfing, and most notably, karate.  He's at purple belt, plus he does the tournament team and when he turned 10 he began the leadership training program.

Here he is demonstrating the bo weapon form.  It's so fun to watch.  I've never seen him be so dedicated and work so hard for something.  It's waaayyyy too expensive, but to me it is a non-negotiable expense.  It has developed him more than anything else in his life.  I can't possibly imagine taking that away and I'm pretty sure he will go all the way with it.

He's a natural born actor.  He can memorize lines like it's nothing and he delivers like a natural.  I'd love for him to pursue this talent a little more but his karate takes up much of his free time.  He has mentioned that when he gets to Jr. High he would like to audition for the plays they put on each year.  I think he'd be great at it.

My beautiful boy is growing up right before my very eyes, sometimes obstinate and sassy like a teenager, sometimes silly like a big kid, sometimes whiny and out of sorts like a toddler.  He has many challenges to face in his life.  He has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and recently has begun showing signs of Tourettes Syndrome as well.  I guess if I had to deal with that each day I might get a bit pissy sometimes too.  And yet he handles it with such grace.  He isn't embarrassed.  He doesn't try to hide it.  He just tells it like it is and so far the kids and teachers at school have been very gracious.  He has a regular group of kids he hangs out with during school and some very good friends he hangs out with at home and on the weekends.  He doesn't worry much about being "cool", which ultimately is better than being pre-occupied by it, but there I times I wish he worried enough to care if his clothes match!  Lately, though, he has been asking me what girls like in a guy.  I'm NOT ready for that, that's for sure!

I love this boy ferociously.  He knows exactly which buttons to push to make me nuts and can debate the point for hours.  He lets his emotions all hang out and you never have to guess where you stand with him or what he thinks about something.  I love that.  He's terrified/fascinated about aliens, but just can't help looking at alien encounter books at the library.  He, being a typical OCD person, worries too much about the things he can't definitively prove or disprove, like said aliens and Big Foot and ghosts.  Night time at our house is not nearly as peaceful as I would like. He hates sleeping alone and ends up on our floor many nights.  

And yet there is such clarity with him at times.  He is the one that will stop and say, "wait a minute here.  Let's just all take a deep breath and start over" when things are going terribly wrong between us.   And as much as his brother drives him crazy, and as mean as he can be to Zoltar, he will defend him to the end if he thinks anyone else is being mean.  He will cuddle with his brother when he is afraid and the few times I have thought Zoltar is lost, it's Mr. Man that freaks out the most.  He has always been very spiritual even though we don't spend much time talking about such things around here.  He has spent a lot of time thinking about the nature of the Universe already, and has developed his own theory about life after death. 

There is so much to this young man that when I stop and think about it I am humbled and deeply gratful that I am the lucky person that gets to be his Mom.  He's not only my wonderful boy, he's been one of the greatest teachers I've ever had.  And I am proud to say, at least for now, he's also my friend.  Love you Mr. Man!

Disneyland Christmas Adventure 2009

So many things to love about this picture.  Yes, we are all squinting because it is so bright.  And this is the better of two pics taken.  I also really like the clear view of the lady in purple's bad bleach job and bottom.  I also dig the lady in green directly behind us and the fact that the gentleman we asked to take the picture didn't turn the camera to capture all of Sleeping Beauty's castle, so the whole top is chopped off.  Oh well, what can you do.

Here we are at the Reindeer Roundup in Frontier Land.  When I positioned the boys, the deer were sideways.  I guess they moved while I was focusing the camera.  Just as the picture was taken the one on the right let go and made room for more food (if you know what I mean).  Can you seriously imagine being able to poo and eat at the same time?  

OK, side-note, throughout these pictures I would like to you notice the smiles that my boys purposely practiced and perfected for the photos.  These were crafted to make them look adorable.

All right then, moving on. 

.


Day #2 was spent in California Adventure.  First things first, we had to pay homage to our favorite Pixar movie to date.  Oh we've loved them all, but Cars has earned a special place in our hearts.  Tow-mater is Z's idea of a cool car.  As you can see, M is more of the fast, red, shiny type.

Right after this picture we got in the line for Soarin' Over California.  M pitched a fit.  The ride was stupid.  He was too big for such a stupid ride.  He wanted to go ride something cool. On and on and on.  Seriously to the point I was getting quite angry and ready to take him back to the hotel.  Did I mention Nana and Pops came along for the first two days?  Thank GOD for Nana and Pops because 1) they managed to keep him only very obnoxious instead of exteremely obnoxious and 2) they kept me from totally freaking out and telling him what an annoying little *&#% he was being.  Just about the time we hit the front of the line, he actually remembered the ride and remembered that, oh yeah, he actually really liked this particular attraction and that he had thought we were doing something different.  Never you mind the 1001 times I told him he liked this ride.  What do I know right?

 

M really wanted to ride the BIG BOY rides.  So R took him on this one.  I hate this ride soooo much.  I'm glad R has someone to to do it with that isn't me.  M actually looks excited.  R looks like he might pass out.  Not sure what the hand thing he has going on there is. Right after this, WHOOSH!  

  
That night we went to Goofy's Kitchen Buffet.  I didn't realize you had to call early to get a decent reservation, so we ended up going at 8:00 pm.  By then we were all fried.  We'd been at the Lego store forever, and we were sore, tired and hungry.  Luckily the food was OK, not $75 a pop OK, but we were all really hungry so just about anything would have been OK.  The boys did really enjoy the characters. Especially Chip & Dale. And while we are at this point of the story I would like to take a moment for a bit of a rant.

I realize that it was getting to a point where the characters were being mobbed and they wanted to make it so people could have a chance to actually get near the character and have a picture taken, etc. etc.  But to make it so you have to buy a really pricey meal to see 75% of them is rather ridiculous.  It's a racket I tell you!

Rant over.  Next.                                            Day #3.  Back at Disneyland.  This is a Monday mind you.  Disneyland actually reached capacity and had to close the gates.  So you can imagine how freakin' many people were there.  The rides were a joke and even walking around was an exercise in frustration.  So we hit some of the less popular attractions.  Like to riverboat.  And the island formerly known as Huck Finn's island, now known as something like Pirates of the Caribbean island.  They did actually put in a few cool pirate-y things, but the best thing was that is was unpopulated and the kids could run and climb and let R and I sit by ourselves for a minute.  for those who don't know my kids, they talk a lot.  And they don't really care if the other one is talking.  And they talk loud and fast.  And if no one is talking they will talk just to fill the silence.  So by day 3, my ears needed a break.  So the island was AWESOME!!!  

Day #4 we decided to make use of our early morning.  We rode more rides that morning than we did all day the rest of the days.  R was over it but I thought the last day was our best day.  Again, not sure what R is doing, but M is right on target.  We love the Buzz ride.  We rode all the good rides one more time in both Disneyland and California Adventure.  I was planning to finish the day and trip off with Fantasmic but it was voted and on and everyone was tired and ready to call it a day.  From this picture, I think we made the right call.  


One last story.  On the 1st night of our trip we watched Elf in the hotel room.  My boys laughed their butts off at the part where Elf pushes all the buttons in the elevator.  They kept joking about doing that and we kept telling them not to.  On the 2nd night of our trip, as we reached our floor, R looked around, told us to RUN and hit the buttons.  We ran to our room and laughed and laughed.  It totally shocked the boys and was fun.  Well, I'm sure you can figure out what happened next.  The last night, R and I stopped in the lobby to confirm our flight plans.  The boys asked if they could go up to the room so we gave them a key.  5 minutes later we open the door to our room and both of them come running, bawling their eyes out, babbling something about SECURITY!!!  After we calmed them down enough to talk we found out that they had decided to pull the ELF stunt themselves.  However, being young and inexperienced pranksters, they didn't look to see if anyone was getting on the elevator first.  A young couple with a baby got on and the man freaked out.  He gave them the riot act, asked their names and told them he was calling security.  I guess he was being kind of over the top because his wife eventually told him to let it go and leave them alone.  Not sure if he was doing it just to scare them or if they came across and individual needing some anger management, but nothing came of it.  R taught them one last prankster tip: NEVER GIVE THEM YOUR REAL NAME!  Ah, the lessons passed from one generation to the next.  


So we had fun and now the boys can quit bugging me about Disneyland and R can go to El Salvador to surf for his 40th birthday without feeling guilty and I got my Disney fix for a year or two.  Mission Accomplished.

 

Menu Planning Monday

Trying to make life a little more predictable around here by planning our meals out in advance.  That way I know what I'll be cooking, thereby skipping the dreaded "what the heck am I going to cook for dinner" at 4 o'clock while standing in front of the fridge, and the kids will know what to expect as well.

Monday- leftover pizza from the birthday party
Tuesday-dinner at a friend's house
Wednesday-curry chicken with rice, corn

Thursday-leftover pork chops, pasta salad, mandarin oranges
Friday-going out-kids having dinner with Nana and Pops
Saturday-potluck-make cookies to bring
Sunday-beef medallions, roasted potatoes, glazed carrots

Wow!  I don't have to cook much this week!  Love that.

Christmas 2009

We had an awesome, though hectic Christmas.  We are in the middle of a kitchen remodel.  We thought we would be getting wood floors on the 15th of December.  Because I didn't want to put decorations up and then have to move them, only to put them back again, I put off decorating.  As most people who have done any sort of remodeling know, what the plan is, and what actually happens are usually two different things.  When the floor arrived on the 15th, knowing that it needs to acclimate for about 2 weeks, and being the Einstein that I am, I realized that we wouldn't be getting our floors before Christmas.  At this point I realized, not without some major guilt tripping from my eldest and my father, that I had better put up a tree.  So I did.  Voila!  Christmas decorations done!  Meanwhile I was slowly moving everything out of the kitchen and the living room to prepare.

Now to add to the crazy, cuz that's how I roll y'all, and after deliberating on what the hell to get my kids for Christmas because they already own a ton of crap toys, and I'm totally bizarro mom because I don't allow much in the way of electronics, I suggested we take the kids on a Christmas trip to DISNEYLAND.  OK, OK, I will totally admit that I've been jonesin' to see the mouse but I figured the boys would be happy too.  To my utter and complete surprise R. said YES.  I later realized that it was because he had a 40th b-day trip planned to surf in  El Salvador for 10 DAYS and he was feeling like he better do some kissing up.  And to keep it really interesting we decided to keep it a surprise.  And to add even more madness we decided to leave ON CHRISTMAS DAY.  That way it would be immediate gratification like any other Christmas present, and the floor guys could do their dirty work while we were gone.  And so, that is what we did. 

So my kids had a week of school off before Christmas which had to be the most boringest week of their lives because I was working my arse off to have everything painted and moved before we left but of course I couldn't tell them that.  I just kept promising them that we would do some fun stuff after Christmas.  The day before we moved out all the appliances and everything but the couch and the Christmas tree.  Furniture piled up EVERYWHERE dude.  Total fire hazard.

Christmas morning M woke up at 4:30 AM.  OK I wish there was a way to emphasize the OMG factor of that in writing, so just imagine I yelled the 4:30 part emphatically to emphasize the ridiculousness of that.  When, being the ruiners of all goodness and fun that we are, we suggested (OK required) him to GO BACK TO BED!!!! he spent the next hour crying.  Sobbing really and bemoaning how difficult his life is and how he wished he could be more patient but just couldn't.  At 5:30 am Z woke up and told M to go back to sleep because he thought that it was still Christmas Eve and that if M didn't stop crying and go to sleep already then Santa would never come.  M informed him between sobs that he was trying for the love of Pete.  At 6:00 R and I relented and let them go get their stocking while we put on our robes and slippers and got a cup of life, I mean coffee.  And so our day began.

Now let me tell you that I was actually a little worried about how this Christmas was going to go over.  Not only were they notr getting much in the way of stuff from us, but Santa was unable to deliver the only thing Z wanted, a bigger tractor with a scoop or snow plow.  Now mind you, Santa was NOT lazy or uncaring.  Santa had searched the world over for a bigger tractor with a scoop and/or snow plow.  

Finding a tractor for a child over the age of 5 and 50 pounds proved to be a daunting task.  Apparently most children grow out of the construction phase.  But let me tell you people, there is an underserved segment of the population out there, kids over the age of 5 who have construction and farming in their blood.  These are the builder children, the ones who dismantle things and build new things with them even if these things are your new stuff and his building seems a little more like destroying.  These are the children that become contractors or architects or farmers.  These are outside kids, boys aching to become men.  The hands on kind of kid.  And I have one.  And I could not find this kid a tractor.  Sidenote:  when a family doesn't have TV their children don't see much in the way of advertising and so when they ask for something it is usually because they really really want that particular item.  Even more so when it is the ONLY thing on their list and they have written Santa about it more than once.  Ugh.


But guess what?  They do make them.  In Germany.  And they do sell them.  In Europe.  Does anyone in the U.S. have one?  Nope.  Ask me how much it costs to ship one here?  $400 is my answer.  WTF!!  Don't we have farm kids in the U.S. who want a tractor?  Why on earth can't you find one here?  I dunno.  But there is a happy ending to our story.  I found one on E-bay, right here on American soil.  So I bought it but it wouldn't be here before Christmas.  And to add some more to the crazy, both boys birthdays are in the beginning of January.  So I had his present in the bag.


So we get up and they see that Santa has brought them a new flat screen TV (not even sure why that happened yet because it is still in the box) and were excited.  Then they see that they have each received a new carry on suitcase.  Moderate enthusiasm.  Then they open their Santa gifts which include Lego sets and a tool box for Z and a fire starting flint for M (maybe I have a secret shadow side wish to have my children destroy my home, I don't know).  Then they open two Mickey Mouse greeting cards that inform them we are going to Disneyland.  And much to my relief and satisfaction they are STOKED.  M kept asking if it was a joke and Z kept yelling "Thank You".  And that we were leaving later that day was even more exciting.  But yes, Z did mention that he was sad he didn't get his new bigger tractor with a scoop and a snow plow.  I told him we would find one for his birthday, wink-wink.

So it went well.  R and I then spent the next few hours getting everything ready for the floor guys to come and getting everything packed for our adventure.  Then we headed off to Nana and Pops for breakfast and some gift opening with the extended family.  At 1 PM we said good-bye and headed off to the airport.  A quick 1 hour and 30 minutes later we touched down in Cali, found our shuttle, checked into the airport and settled in.  Then we had an extremely mediocre buffet at the hotel, who I will cut some slack because a) they are in the middle of a huge remodel, and b) we got a screamin' deal because of said remodel, and c) kids ate free so it wasn't too expensive.  And with that we went to bed so we could get ready for DISNEYLAND!!!

I'll save the Disneyland info for the next post.

How Family V does Christmas

GOOD MORNING ANYONE WHO ACTUALLY READS MY BLOG!!!!

I'm totally using the same questionnaire found at SortaCrunchy's blog.  What can I say?  I like waxing poetic about myself.


1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?
   
I like egg nog, I really do.  I'm not sure why I want to say egg nog, but if I'm honest, I'm a hot chocolate person.  In the winter months we drink A LOT of hot chocolate.  M, on the other hand, loves him some pumpkin spice egg nog.  He's had 3 quarts in the last two weeks.  Time to lay of the nog dude.


2. Does Santa wrap?

  You know, it really depends on the year.  Growing up at my house Santa always wrapped.  R's house on the other hand was definitely a not wrapped house.  This was a bit of an argument for the first few years of parenthood.  R wanted to come home from the festivities and go to bed.  I would still have loads of wrapping to do.  He would proceed to tell me I was crazy, I would call him a lazy scrooge.  Fun times.  Now if I'm in a hurry, no wrap.  This year there was a mix of both.


3. Colored lights or white?

  I bought LED lights last year for outside.  I can't say I've fallen in love with the look, but I'm all for the environmental and financial benefits.  Inside I usually go for white.  I bought a pre-lit tree last year, which my cat promptly went to town on.  For most of this year and last there was one section that I couldn't get to light so we had the tree on blinking lights as a distraction (worked pretty well if I do say so myself).  This morning I went to turn on the tree and none of it came on, so currently the answer is: none.


4. Do you hand mistletoe?

No.  I always think I would like to though.  Where does one even buy mistletoe?


5. When do you decorate?


Many years it is right after Thanksgiving.  Last year I had friends giving me loads of crap because I started before Thanksgiving.  This year we are in the middle of a remodel and are having wood floors installed on the 28th.  Originally we thought they were going in on the 15th so I told the kids we would wait until the floor was done and then do the tree.  When that day came and went I figured I better put up a tree.  So we (or more accurately, I) put up the tree on the 19th.  Rich is often the first to put up the house lights because he like to get it done before it really snows.  This year, I don't know what happened, but it happened pretty late as well.  Slackers, we are.


6. What is your favorite holiday dish?


Hands down it is my mom's Sweet Potatoes and Sausage recipe.  I've never like the sweet goo that most people try to pass off at Thanksgiving.  Apparently my mom felt the same way.  I was in my late teens when my mom found the recipe in a low-fat cookbook.  It is: 
1 lb. turkey sausage browned, add 3-4 leeks, sliced, sauteeing until transluscent, add 1/2 t thyme.  Slice 4-5 sweet potatoes.  Layer with sausage mixture, starting with sweet potatoes, twice.  Pour 1/4 C apple juice over the top, sprinkle with parmesan cheese and pop in a 350 degree oven for about 30-40 minutes. Soooo yummy!
I'm also a fan of R's grandma's 7 layer cake.  An old Hungarian classic that she makes once a year.  She is 84 and didn't have the energy this year :(  I guess I better learn how to make it to keep the tradition alive.


7. Favorite holiday memory?

Hmmmm.... I'd like to have some P.C. memory that isn't about stuff and is filled with the spirit of Christmas, but honestly, the first thing that popped into my mind was the HUGE Barbie dream house I got in 1st grade.  The funny thing is, I really only played with Barbies because my best friend Cheri liked them.  But it was a really cool house.  My parents told me later it took my dad 8 straight hours to build.  He kept calling my mom to swear and bitch about it.  See, there's your Christmas Spirit.  Isn't it beautiful my dad would do that for me?  True sacrifice and unconditional love and all that.

Actually, I also really like helping my mom wrap the Santa gifts to my youngest sister late on Christmas Eve.  She is 8 years younger than I am and it was really fun to know what she was getting and watch her surprise and happiness.

And last but not least (OK I realize this is 3 memories but it is my blog right?), I realize now that I liked when my brother would come into my room to get me and we would sneak up the stairs, partners in crime for 1 morning a year, to peak into the living room.  We weren't allowed to go in or wake up our parents (who I now realize were trying unsuccessfully to sleep in a little) until 8 am.  We'd take turns crawling or tip-toeing to the doorway, scan the room and report back.  Usually we'd get busted once or twice.  Finally mom would tell us we could look at the stockings.  There was always, among other things, an apple, orange, Avon chap stick, Fernwood sandwich mints and barrettes in mine.  Good times.


8. When and how did you learn about Santa?

I think it was about 3rd grade.  I was definitely a kid that wanted to believe, so I remember just choosing to do so even when the other kids were choosing not to believe.  And my older brother swore he believed, and he was older and cool, so if he believed, I believed.  At some point, I just realized it didn't make sense.  I had found presents under the bed one year, the tags were in my mom's handwriting, etc.  I told my brother he didn't have to pretend anymore, he told me I better not tell my younger sisters and to pretend for mom and dad's sake as well.  So I did.  I realized he pretended for several years for me and that I appreciated that, so I did that for my sisters.  I wasn't sad or mad or disappointed.  I guess I felt more clever for having figured it out and pulling one over on my parents.  Plus I knew Santa would still come because I had younger sisters and my parents had to give us stuff to keep up the charade for the younger ones.


I'm figuring it is our last year around here.  M is in 4th grade and I see him going through all the mental gymnastics I did to continue believing.  Z keeps saying it doesn't make sense, but since M believes, and he is still fairly easy to lie to, he vacillates.  I know the younger ones stop believing earlier, and M can't keep a secret worth shit, so I figure this year was it.  I'm kinda sad.  I can't believe it went so fast and it makes me feel like time is going WAAAYYYY to fast.  On the other hand, I'm kinda relieved to not have to be so careful and to move on to the next phase where the kids can help me pick out what they want, or we can choose a vacation instead of gifts.  And I wonder if we should still keep it up even though both kids know?  Not sure how to proceed at that point.  


9. Do you open a gift Christmas Eve?

Nope.  I guess cuz we didn't as kids.  R's family did the PJ thing I think, which I considered doing, but my SIL L. gives them PJs at our V family Christmas shindig every year (which I think is such a cool aunt thing to do by the way), which is usually the Sunday before the big day, so they wear those.  


10. How do you decorate the tree?

It's kind of an evolving thing.  This year we used only red, white and silver ornaments.  I thought it looked really pretty while the lights still worked.


11. Snow.  Love it or leave it?

Since I live in Utah I'm stuck with cold for the Winter.  If it is going to be cold, it might as well snow so we can at least snowboard or sled.  And I'd rather look outside to a white winter wonderland than a gray bleak landscape.  And it clears out the dreaded inversion gunk, so that is always a nice benefit.  But honestly, I could move someplace warm for the winter and be just fine.  A yearly snowboard vacation would be just fine by me.  I HATE BEING COLD!!!!


12. Can you ice skate?

Can I skate?  Technically yes.  Can I skate well?  With any amount of grace or fluidity that one thinks of when one thinks of ice skating?  HA! No. But I do think it is fun to give it a go once or twice a season, preferably outside.


13. Do you remember a favorite gift?

Aside from the Barbie Dream Mansion?  I remember a few, mostly from my teen years, and mostly clothes .  In 4th grade I had my first fight with my mom about clothes.  China doll shoes were very in style and I wanted some.  They were total cheapy cloth shoes and she wanted me to get some Bass loafers.  I threw a fit and we compromised on me getting both.  Of course the loafers were warmer in the winter and lasted way longer. In 6th or 7th grade I received a Scritti Politti tape from my brother.  It was significant because he was a rocker and I was a waver and it was an ongoing feud about which was better.  So the fact that he gave me a waver music tape was really nice.  In 6th grade I also started wearing women's sizes and my mom took me to the Limited and I got several very cool outfits.  In 7th grade I wanted some Reeboks with the straps but there were sold out everywhere so I got the low tops with the laces.  I just never loved them.  And my Freshman year a got a new Columbia ski outfit with the black tights and big puffy bright coat.  I looked good. 


14. What is the most important thing about Christmas?


Bonding as a family.


15. What is your favorite holiday treat?

I still love the Fernwood mints.


16. Fave tradition?


Opening gifts?  Is that weak?  It's true.


17. Star or Angel?


Totally a star person.


18. Giving or receiving?

After reading The Five Love Languages I realized my primary love language is gifts.  R's is not.  For years I felt bad that I spent a lot of time and effort to give him the perfect gift and he often didn't give me anything at all.  I've realized that I like to give great gifts and it doesn't matter if the other person matches my gift to them.  That said, I do love receiving something heartfelt.  I love the cheesy stuff my kids make me at school.  R and I have talked about our Love Language and he is doing better.


19. Do you like candy canes?


Sure.  


20. Fave Christmas show?

Probably A Christmas Story.  Makes me laugh every time.


21. Saddest Christmas song?

Well obviously it is Christmas Shoes.  I mean come on, his mom is freaking dying for hell sakes.  I seriously hate that song. Who the hell writes a song like that?  


22. Thing You are most looking forward to for next Christmas?

That my sister and her husband will have moved back.  They are both pretty cool cats and S has a wicked dry sense of humor that I so appreciate.  And the kids love them.  They didn't fly home this year and they are definitely missed.


23. Best thing about this Christmas?

We are going to Disneyland.  TODAY!  So excited.


24. Fave gift this year?

It's a tie between the bag I bought for Rich to give me and the bicycle basket I bought myself.  I got a really cute note from Myles too.


25. Christmas Wish?

Sounds cheesy but I truly do wish for each and every person on this earth to find Peace within their heart.


MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!


 






 

 

Hi-Ya!

M had a tournament this morning.  He took 3rd for his self-defense technique.  I really thought he was going to get 3rd for his kata as well but he didn't.  He got his butt kicked in sparring but he was also much smaller than both opponents.  All in all I'm glad he won at least trophy to keep his spirits up.

The more I watch the kids do karate, especially when I watch the girls on the tournament team train and compete, I know I want to get my black belt.  It looks so empowering.  I need to ask M's karate instructor which school he would recommend for me.  I seriously am thinking it is time to get this goal going.

After the tournament the boys and I went to see Harry Potter 6.  I've read all the books but I forgot how sad The Half Blood Prince is.  Just long and bleak.  The movie was well down though.  We have been watching the first 5 movies at home lately and I'm impressed with how much their acting has improved over the course of the movies. 

And to top it off, tonight we are watching UP on DVD.  I really like the movie but the beginning is so sad!  Makes you realize how quickly life can pass you buy while you think you will get to your dreams "later". 

Makes you think.

I've Been Buffaloed!

So Z has been telling me for ages that he has $24.41 in his coin jar.  I keep promising him I will take it to the bank to have it turned into dollars.  This has been going on for over a month now.

So yesterday I take the boys to Target to get underwear and socks (waaayyy too exciting, I know).  Z starts in that he wants a Star Wars Lego set.  I remind him that he has no more money in his allowance envelope since he spent it all at the rock shop a few weeks back, but I do owe him $10 for this week's allowance, minus $2 for savings, giving him a grand total of $8. Not nearly enough for the Lego set he has in mind. He reminds me that he has $24.41 in coins and if I will front him the money I can keep the coins.  I really don't mind buying Legos because I think they are just about the perfect toy (except barefoot in the middle of the night), so I agree.  He picks one out, asks if we are going straight to pay, then proceeds to nag me for the next 10 minutes as I drag him over to get R some underwear and then through the Christmas decor just because I want to.  As soon as he gets home he builds it and then of course tells me he wishes he had another Lego set. 

Fast forward to 10 minutes ago when I decide that I will take his change jar and add it to mine.  I look in, and it is quite full...of pennies.  Then I remember that some time last summer he showed me how to make my money "bigger" by putting the penny half way in, so the automatic counting mechanism goes off, then pulling it out to do it over and over again.  I tried explaining how it didn't really work because he really still only had the one penny.  He seemed to not get that at all, I decided it was hopeless and we moved on.  Until this afternoon.  Looking at this large pile of pennies (and a few Costa Rican coins) I use my exceptional reasoning skills and conclude that there is no way he has $24.41.  Being bored and a huge procrastinator, I decide to add them, one by one, to my magical coin counting jar.  Yeah, I feel smart.  I'm writing this with coin blackened fingers and I'm just over $3 richer. 

Of course I'm not going to say anything.  Money is still pretty much lost on Z.  But you bet your bottom dollar that I won't fall for that again. 

Just Kill Me Now

So I've been workin' out.  Liftin' weights and such. (don't ask about the Sarah Palin accent, not sure where it came from).  I have a new workout partner who we shall call LESLIE!!! Well Ms. Leslie is one tuff beeyatch (not said with malice, mind you, instead spoken in pain).  Each week I drag my sorry out-of-shape ass to the local gym and secretly pray that Leslie has met with some sort of issue that will keep her from her killing-G-with-a-workout duties.  Not like she got ran over by a bus issue, just maybe that she had to meet with a client, or had a flat tire, or the swine-flu.  Nothing MAJOR people.  But no, she shows up regularly to punish me.

Now you may be asking "G, why on earth would you pick Ms. Leslie as your workout partner if you feel this way"?  To which I would reply, "Because I'm VAIN for hell sakes!  I want to have a rockin' MILF bod. DUH!"  And Leslie is strong and not wussy and won't let me be wussy and won't skip out on the workout because Einstein's is calling our name.  Leslie wants to workout.  I've never had a workout partner that actually wants to really workout.  And because I'm also SCARED, I don't dare stand her up either.  And so every Tuesday and Thursday I go, with trepidation in me heart, to work my muscles (said Muskles).

Well, yesterday way like any other Tuesday.  Leslie: you ready for some legs?  Me: isn't Tuesday arms? (Because unlike a regular girl, I actually have a stronger upper body than lower body.  Can you say HE/SHE?)  Leslie: We haven't done legs in awhile, so let's do legs. (Leslie loves legs.  She is the kind of gal that kicks most guys asses on the uphill climb mountain biking).  Me (in a tiny little defeated voice): um, ok.  So she shows the the 1st circuit (because there is always more than one), and by the end of the first of 3 times doing the 1st circuit, I'm cramping.  Leslie has powered thru 2 times by the time I am hobbling thru the 1st.  But I manage to make it through all 3 (CONFESSION:  I only did 10 reps on the 1 legged squats.  Shhhh.).  Then she shows me circuit numero dos.  Calves.  OK, I can do calves.  More hamstrings.  Greaaat.  never mind that I already have shooty burny pains from the back of my knees up thru to the top of my ass.  Let's do some MORE!  Then some abs.  Normally I hate abs the most, but not today.  Hamstrings definitely win.  I start with abs.  OK I am seeing some improvements in strength there.  Then I muscle thru the calves.  No problemo!  Then the hamstrings.  Again.  I barely make it through 10 on each set while Leslie actually LAUGHS AT ME!  Or with me.  I'm not sure.  Anyway.  I figure we have to be done right?  I can barely walk.  But nooooooo.  One more circuit.  I'm figuring abs and telling myself, "You can do some abs, it will be fine".  About this time I also start thinking about tapping various spots on my face because I've been reading about this stress reduction technique where you tap all around your body and tell yourself stuff while you think about your issues and supposedly, poof!, you don't have an issue anymore.  EFT or something.  You know the guy that says, "I CAN MAKE YOU THIN!".  But I'm too self-conscious, so I don't.  We head into the group room and she pulls out a step and two risers.  OK, Leslie, what are you up to?   And then she tells me, you guessed it, one more set of, all together now, HAMSTRINGS!  I honestly thought about walking out right then.  Sort of like my disastrous Mexican bikini wax (oh! rojo!) where I wanted to jump off the table and run out of the "spa" screaming with half a bush wax while trying to put on my pants, but didn't, and instead just went to my happy place until it was over.  Pretty much just like that.  So I do the first set.  Ouch.  Then we do some sit-ups, for which I am actually grateful for.  Then set number two.  This time Leslie "forgets" that she is helping me place the weights between my feet and starts on her own set.  I think, "I can do it!" flop around like a fish out of water for a minute trying to get the weights positioned correctly, do so, then attempt to propel my body forward to the right spot on the step.  Instead I spaztically throw myself forward all of about 2 inches and land half on the step, half off with a loud "umph!"  at which point Leslie starts giggling and can't really stop while she helps me again.  We finish up and I gingerly walk out of the gym saying, "see you Thursday!".

You know when you realize that you are so sore now, that by tomorrow you will be crippled, and the next day may just possibly be even worse?  That's how I felt all day yesterday.  My legs actually collapsed under me in Kohls.  Luckily I caught myself and didn't sprawl on the floor.  By 8:30 I was ready for bed.  I would have taken a bath, but the Z-man used all the hot water for his bath.  Inconsiderate much?

I woke up this morning pretty much as expected-broken.  I need to paint but it just ain't gonna happen today.  I want to Zumba but I'm not sure I can.  I dread having to pee because lowering myself to the toilet is such an ordeal.  I just want to sit.  I know it doesn't make much sense, but I'm going to go take a hot bath with epsom salts and hope that my muscles loosen up enough to go to Zumba.  If not, I may just find a stack of books and read in the sun all day.  It is such a beautiful day.  Even my hardcore workout husband would understand because he has been just this sore before. 

Oh Leslie.  I love ya.  I really do.  But I'm saying it for the record:  I AM ONLY DOING 12 REPS UNTIL DECEMBER.  Self-preservation mode has kicked in.  Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to hobble off to the bath.  Is it too early for wine?  Yeah?  Fine, I'll take some green tea instead.