Fun with Childhood illnesses

Two weeks ago Friday, M went to the pediatrician for his well-child check. All good except that his tonsils are huge. They always have been but this time his ped wanted him to go see an ENT to look at them. Since our deductible is HUGE, I put it off.

Two weeks ago Sataurday, Z came down with an obvious classic case of strep. Fever. Sore throat. Big nap on a Saturday. So down to the express care for a culture and a course of amoxicillan.

I kept waiting for M to get it because he always does when it's going around. But two weeks pass and I began to think we had managed to dodge it this time. I finally schedule an appointment with the ENT for Friday (yesterday) because M has been stuffy, but not obviously sick, for about a month. I figured it was allergies (praying it's dust and pollan and not the cat), but since he needed to have his tonsils checked out anyway, I figured I'd just bite the bullet and get it all checked out.

Thursday M wakes up and says "My throat feels weird". I ask if it hurts-no, not really. Does it hurt when you swallow? No, just feels weird. I take his temp-normal. He eats breakfast and heads to school. About 11:30 I get a call because he forgot his library book. I ask if his throat still feels weird. Yep, but it doesn't hurt. I make the executive decision to pull him out of school and go get him tested for strep. I check the back of his throat, bright red and patchy. Another trip to the express care, another positive culture, another round of amoxicillan. And to top it off, two ear infections brewing. Nice. And all he says is his throat feels weird.

Dr. says he's fine for school the next day, so off he goes. But today he's added a major gooey nose. I pick him up early and head to the ENT. He takes one look at his tonsils and says, schedule the surgery, sooner than later. Not only will it help him not get strep 2-3 times every year, but he should sleep a whole lot better and that should help his anxiety level come down a bit. And by the way, he has chronic sinitis, not allergies, which the amoxicillan won't touch. So another trip to the pharmacy, a new antibiotic, and I've dropped over $200 on strep throat this month. Ouch!

So I'm trying to figure out the best time to take little Einstein out of school for 10 days. He was initially freaking out about the idea of surgery, but the promise of 10 days of no school, TV, Playstation and ice cream seems to have comforted him quite a bit. Plus a friend at school told him that it really wasn't that bad. I'm thinking the week before Thanksgiving because those two weeks are a joke anyway with all the short days and days off.

I don't even want to know what the surgery will cost. We may actually meet our deductible this year. At least it's tax deductible, right?

Discipline

So R and I have decided that we really do need to be on the same page for discipline at our house. M has gotten quite mouthy and argumentative. Z is more passive-agressive and just ignores me and does whatever he wants anyway. He's also very sneaky and prone to lying a bit. When it comes to discipline, I'm the softy, the slacker. I just want peace. R is the toughy, the yeller. He doesn't want to be embarassed or inconvenienced. One day M told us that he wished we were more like his teacher from last year, Mrs. Jones. He felt like she was strict, but nice. Firm, but fair. Well, there's nothing like your kid telling you to get your act together.

We have picked the book "How to Behave So Your Kids Will Too" by Sal Severe. What an awesome book. Exactly the mix between giving kid's power and responsibility relative to their age and actions, and the parent's having the authority that is needed in a family. We have started some of the recommendations immediately while we work through the book together.

Yesterday was our first day with our new time-out rules. It was so unbelievable difficult to stay committed when your child is in total meltdown. But we did, and the difference it is already making is pretty unbelievable. M only needed one time-out, but it took a long time for him to stop arguing and muttering so that we could actually start the time. Z also had an extremely long time-out because he wouldn't stay put. But we made it through.

The rest of the day M was rather quiet, which always worries me. But he was also amazingly compliant and cooperative. We went for a hike in the afternoon, which he usually will complain about before, during and after. Yesterday he actually enjoyed the hike, and told us so several times. At the end we realized we had locked our keys in the car. R was grumpy and short for a few minutes. M just played quietly while we waited for the locksmith to unlock the car. Before bed we talked and worked out any lingering bad feelings. He also mentioned he thought he handled the locked car more maturely than R. I laughed and had to agree. He felt really proud of himself. He fell right asleep. Today he asked me to please help him work through an argument with Z. Amazing!

Z is still testing to see if we are serious. We had another time-out today that took about 20 minutes total. He just won't stop trying to get "one more chance". But I have also given him several warnings today that he is headed towards a bad decision, and he has quickly corrected his behavior. He's pretty bull-headed, so it may take a little longer with him.

All in all, we have had two really pleasant days. I haven't had to yell or threaten or feel upset that I'm being ignored. The boys are playing together well and doing what they are asked to do with minimal protest. I am really excited about the book and the progress. Now I just have to stay consistent, which is always the hard part for me. But it helps to have R on board and the two of us working toward the same goal.