I just finished reading this book. I can't tell you how much I loved it! Why you ask? Well I'll tell you!
First and foremost, it is just damn funny! It really isn't often that I will laugh right out loud regardless of where I happen to be, but this book had me bursting forth over and over. He really has a way of describing things, painting a vivid picture so that you can just imagine how bizarre some of the escapades he participates in are. He has a sharp wit and a keen eye for the ridiculous. He is just so darn likable! Believe me when I say to you "This book is hilarious!".
OK, reason #2 is the message in the book. He is living his life on autopilot, going through the motions. He is on a treadmill, going through the motions but getting nowhere. And then something happens that changes his entire way of thinking. And he realizes that he needs be open to things for life to happen! He has to be willing to acknowledge and act upon the opportunities that are right in front of him if he would only open his eyes and his mind.
Now of course he does this in a very rigid and controlled fashion. As an experiment more than anything. But he does realize that there life is full of "coincidences" once you are open and willing for anything to happen. All you have to do is show up! And is really zeroes in the idea of everything being connected and the cause and effect relationship every single choice and action we make has on the world around us. I love the idea of "Si a todo". Yes to everything. Not as a strict set of perimeters, as his experiment was at the onset. But as a general attitude and motto for a full, rich life.
This book was one that has crystallized so many thoughts and feelings I've been having lately. I just can't stop telling people about its concept, as well as telling my husband the stories that made me laugh. God it feels GREAT to laugh. Out loud. A lot. I need to find more stuff that does that for me.
So read it! Just say YES! Si a todo!
2.06.2009
2.05.2009
Oh hi, it's me again.
Well, one month of 2009 already gone. And I never got around to posting my resolutions. Well that's OK, let's just say I used January to really refine my priorities and goals for the year. What I was thinking I'd like to accomplish on January 1st has changed and crystallized into some simpler, but more impact-ful decisions. Sounds to grand doesn't it? Well, not really. It's just life.
Resolution #1
I will bring my own bag instead of using paper or plastic. Even for things other than groceries.
Resolution #2
I will remember that LOVE is a verb.
I will quit trying to change my spouse into a happy, go-lucky optimist, because he really isn't one and it is making our marriage very tense. So I will do my best to point out the good side of things, without being preachy or naggy. When he gets into one of his funks, I will not go all Pollyanna on his ass, nor will I get frustrated with him for not seeing how our thoughts shape our reality. I will either support him by listening attentively, or ask him for what he needs from me, or if I can't be objective, I will tell him I need to think about it before I react, and go from there. I can't keep taking it personally, because it really isn't. He is stressed. He is worried. That is his reality, not mine. I will love him, because I love him. I will do my best to accept him for who he is today. I will be present with whatever our marriage brings and try to not to be so judgmental.
Resolution #3
I will parent as mindfully as I possibly can. I will accept that I am human and will not always do the "right" thing. When I regret how I have handled something, I will acknowledge it, apologize and ask for understanding. I will remember that my children are my equals, they are just younger and less experienced than I am, and that is the way it is supposed to be. I will look for the teachable moments, but I will also look for the learnable moments. My kids are so cool and such fantastic individuals. I will do my best to guide, teach, enjoy, support, and accept my boys for who they are. I will remember that this is their lives we are talking about. I will try my best to take me ego and pride and pre-programmed ideas out of it and just let my heart guide me. I have wonderful motherly intuition. I will trust it, because I have never regretted doing so. I will tell them often how much I love them. I will let them know I trust them to do what is right for them. I will empower them. I will remember that they are children and that they have lots of time to learn "grown-up things". I will take their issues and worries as seriously as I take my own. And I will let them know, often, how cool I think they are. And lots and lots of cuddles and hugs while I can still get them.
Resolution #4
I will live below my means. I will do my best to realize that "stuff" is not what it is about. Money is a resource to help you attend to your priorities and reach your goals. It is not about pride or status. I will do this by simply spending less. I will acquire less stuff. I will look for non-spending solutions whenever possible. I will use my money to further my values and goals. I will expect my spending to have a high ROI. I will save up for things I want. I will remember all the incredible things I already have, and do my best to be grateful and content.
Resolution #5
I will be lucky! I am going to affirm that I am lucky and I will expect lucky things to happen to me. I will also keep track of what lucky things come my way. I will be open to possibilities and say yes more to see what opportunities it may bring. I will express my gratitude daily for all the amazing experiences I have.
Resolution #6
I will reach out to others more. I will call someone to catch up every day. I will do things for the people I care about and support them through their days. I will send cards and letters. I will really listen so I can remember the details. I will HUG (I've never been much of a hugger). I will smile at strangers and strike up conversations when possible. I will be open to what others have to bring into my life, and I will gladly share my gifts with others.
Resolution #7
I will make myself a priority. I will do the things that make me happy because I am every bit as deserving as everyone else. I will cultivate joy in my life. And fun. I will find hobbies that I enjoy, and that give me some time away from my family. I will pursue my interests, even if I have to do them alone. I will see the movies I want to see. I will attend the lectures I am interested in. I will figure out what makes me fabulous (blond hair? pink toes? fab boots? waxed legs? jazzy underwear?) and find the resources to make it happen for myself! I will find ways to learn and enjoy myself. I will be proactive, instead of waiting for it to be a convenient time for everyone else, or for someone else to think of ideas and activities. I will buy myself the gifts I want, the flowers I think are pretty. I will paint the cabinets the color I like. I will journal and blog and collage and imagine so that I keep in tough with my real feeling and desires. I will LOVE me!
Resolution #8
I will walk more. I will walk to keep myself and my kid's and my dog's bodies healthy. I will walk because I am fed up with the quality of the air in this city and am sick about the idea of not letting my kids out to play because the air quality is dangerous. I will walk to put less money in the pockets of people that don't deserve my money. I will keep that money for me and my family. I will walk to have a sense of my community and what is going on in my neighborhood. I will walk and say hello to my neighbors. I will enjoy the feeling of blood pumping in my legs and heart.
Resolution #9.
I will cultivate a home that is peaceful and comfortable. I will not get sucked into the idea that it needs to cost a lot, or that it has to be perfect, shiny and new. I will look for creative, thrifty ways to craft my home into the place I want it to be and a place my family is comfortable and happy. I will make each one of our bedroom's a sanctuary and a personal expression. I will declutter the extraneous and enjoy the cherished. I will learn new skills and take pride in our home!
Resolution #10
I will find a way to make some money for our family. I will do something I enjoy and am good at. I won't do something that is beneath me or that I find boring or disagreeable. I will give marketing for our business the importance it deserves and make sure that each piece has the right message and goes out on time.
So there you have it. I see a lot of "being present" and "living in the now" and being "mindful". I also see quite a bit about loving and accepting, enjoying and fun! I think it boils down to authenticity.
I know that the world has some challenges to overcome. I also know that a bazillion wonderful things happen every freakin' day that no one hears about. I'm going to focus on the positive. I'm doing to do my part to make this planet, my community, my family and my life a better thing than it was last year. I am going to do my best to "be the change that I want to see in the world". Really it comes down to individual actions. I'm excited about this year. I see this year as a time to get back to basics. To cultivate. To learn and improve skills. To prepare. As a catalyst. I also see it as a time for joy, happiness, gratitude and fun. But I see everyday as a time for those. I see those as the purpose and point of life.
Peace!
Resolution #1
I will bring my own bag instead of using paper or plastic. Even for things other than groceries.
Resolution #2
I will remember that LOVE is a verb.
I will quit trying to change my spouse into a happy, go-lucky optimist, because he really isn't one and it is making our marriage very tense. So I will do my best to point out the good side of things, without being preachy or naggy. When he gets into one of his funks, I will not go all Pollyanna on his ass, nor will I get frustrated with him for not seeing how our thoughts shape our reality. I will either support him by listening attentively, or ask him for what he needs from me, or if I can't be objective, I will tell him I need to think about it before I react, and go from there. I can't keep taking it personally, because it really isn't. He is stressed. He is worried. That is his reality, not mine. I will love him, because I love him. I will do my best to accept him for who he is today. I will be present with whatever our marriage brings and try to not to be so judgmental.
Resolution #3
I will parent as mindfully as I possibly can. I will accept that I am human and will not always do the "right" thing. When I regret how I have handled something, I will acknowledge it, apologize and ask for understanding. I will remember that my children are my equals, they are just younger and less experienced than I am, and that is the way it is supposed to be. I will look for the teachable moments, but I will also look for the learnable moments. My kids are so cool and such fantastic individuals. I will do my best to guide, teach, enjoy, support, and accept my boys for who they are. I will remember that this is their lives we are talking about. I will try my best to take me ego and pride and pre-programmed ideas out of it and just let my heart guide me. I have wonderful motherly intuition. I will trust it, because I have never regretted doing so. I will tell them often how much I love them. I will let them know I trust them to do what is right for them. I will empower them. I will remember that they are children and that they have lots of time to learn "grown-up things". I will take their issues and worries as seriously as I take my own. And I will let them know, often, how cool I think they are. And lots and lots of cuddles and hugs while I can still get them.
Resolution #4
I will live below my means. I will do my best to realize that "stuff" is not what it is about. Money is a resource to help you attend to your priorities and reach your goals. It is not about pride or status. I will do this by simply spending less. I will acquire less stuff. I will look for non-spending solutions whenever possible. I will use my money to further my values and goals. I will expect my spending to have a high ROI. I will save up for things I want. I will remember all the incredible things I already have, and do my best to be grateful and content.
Resolution #5
I will be lucky! I am going to affirm that I am lucky and I will expect lucky things to happen to me. I will also keep track of what lucky things come my way. I will be open to possibilities and say yes more to see what opportunities it may bring. I will express my gratitude daily for all the amazing experiences I have.
Resolution #6
I will reach out to others more. I will call someone to catch up every day. I will do things for the people I care about and support them through their days. I will send cards and letters. I will really listen so I can remember the details. I will HUG (I've never been much of a hugger). I will smile at strangers and strike up conversations when possible. I will be open to what others have to bring into my life, and I will gladly share my gifts with others.
Resolution #7
I will make myself a priority. I will do the things that make me happy because I am every bit as deserving as everyone else. I will cultivate joy in my life. And fun. I will find hobbies that I enjoy, and that give me some time away from my family. I will pursue my interests, even if I have to do them alone. I will see the movies I want to see. I will attend the lectures I am interested in. I will figure out what makes me fabulous (blond hair? pink toes? fab boots? waxed legs? jazzy underwear?) and find the resources to make it happen for myself! I will find ways to learn and enjoy myself. I will be proactive, instead of waiting for it to be a convenient time for everyone else, or for someone else to think of ideas and activities. I will buy myself the gifts I want, the flowers I think are pretty. I will paint the cabinets the color I like. I will journal and blog and collage and imagine so that I keep in tough with my real feeling and desires. I will LOVE me!
Resolution #8
I will walk more. I will walk to keep myself and my kid's and my dog's bodies healthy. I will walk because I am fed up with the quality of the air in this city and am sick about the idea of not letting my kids out to play because the air quality is dangerous. I will walk to put less money in the pockets of people that don't deserve my money. I will keep that money for me and my family. I will walk to have a sense of my community and what is going on in my neighborhood. I will walk and say hello to my neighbors. I will enjoy the feeling of blood pumping in my legs and heart.
Resolution #9.
I will cultivate a home that is peaceful and comfortable. I will not get sucked into the idea that it needs to cost a lot, or that it has to be perfect, shiny and new. I will look for creative, thrifty ways to craft my home into the place I want it to be and a place my family is comfortable and happy. I will make each one of our bedroom's a sanctuary and a personal expression. I will declutter the extraneous and enjoy the cherished. I will learn new skills and take pride in our home!
Resolution #10
I will find a way to make some money for our family. I will do something I enjoy and am good at. I won't do something that is beneath me or that I find boring or disagreeable. I will give marketing for our business the importance it deserves and make sure that each piece has the right message and goes out on time.
So there you have it. I see a lot of "being present" and "living in the now" and being "mindful". I also see quite a bit about loving and accepting, enjoying and fun! I think it boils down to authenticity.
I know that the world has some challenges to overcome. I also know that a bazillion wonderful things happen every freakin' day that no one hears about. I'm going to focus on the positive. I'm doing to do my part to make this planet, my community, my family and my life a better thing than it was last year. I am going to do my best to "be the change that I want to see in the world". Really it comes down to individual actions. I'm excited about this year. I see this year as a time to get back to basics. To cultivate. To learn and improve skills. To prepare. As a catalyst. I also see it as a time for joy, happiness, gratitude and fun. But I see everyday as a time for those. I see those as the purpose and point of life.
Peace!
1.03.2009
Bring On 2009!
2008 flew by faster than I can really comprehend. For the most part I feel like it was a really good year for our family and for me personally. Here is a list of a few highlights:
Obama won! I really could not be more optimistic about the direction he wants to take our country in. For so long I have been a little embarrassed by our false bravado, our selfishness, our disregard for the rest of the world, our "bigger is better" mentality, and "Mine! Mine! Mine!" attitude. We finally have earned some respect from the rest of the world and we finally have a rational, intelligent leader who understands the reality we are in and has a plan to begin to rememdy the disasters we have created. I am behind this new administration 100%
R and I came to some agreements on what we needed to do for the health of our family. We have realized where we need some outside help and acquired it, we are making sleep a priority for all of us, we are focusing on wholesome foods, and are being very selective about the quality and quantity of media in our home. I will readily admit that we slip up often, but for the first time I really feel like we are pretty much on the same page with our parenting.
Z started Kindergarten! We are officially past the "pre-schooler" stage. I have really enjoyed moving on to big kid type activities. We went to Lagoon in October and Z pretty much was able to ride everything he wanted to. He is a whiz at math. A dynamo builder and making progress with his reading. He's an absolute sweetheart and loves to help out. He is willing to work hard and is determined to master the skills he associates with being a man. And we finally made significant progress with his encopresis. What a relief that has been for all of us! Z played soccer this year and really is amazing! He just has a natural talent for sports.
M started 3rd grade. So far we really like both his teachers, Mrs. Mitchell for homeroom and Mrs. Olsen for reading. Speaking of reading, M has read 4 Harry Potter books this year as well as 2 Fablehaven books along with a ton of books in between. He has made significant strides with his anxiety and OCD which makes me very proud. He has become very considerate and understands the consequences of his actions. He and his brother have improved their relationship significantly. They still fight like crazy, but there are periods of fun and calm in between. M also received his orange belt in karate and began to take a weapons class. He is really dedicated to his karate lessons and it has been fun to watch him progress.
We got our new kitty Freddy! What an awesome cat! R was so against getting another pet but is just as in love with him as the rest of us. This cat has certainly added some spunk to our house! I am constantly laughing at the stuff this creature does! This brings the total of pets in the family to 4; Pepe our lab, Freddy the kitty, and 2 beta fish.
R had a successful year with his real estate business. It has been a crazy year for the market but R has been solid and committed to following the systems Keller Williams has created for its Realtors and it has paid off. We've seen many agents quit and have somehow managed to soldier on and keep me home with the kids. All in all, his total sales wasn't much lower than last year. Pretty amazing considering the economic meltdown this country has experienced!
I have lost 31 lbs. this year. While much of this I attribute to coming to terms with the fact that I do have ADD and getting the appropriate medication which happens to have the not so horrible side effect of reducing my appetite, I have also improved my diet and done a lot of walking! I feel so much better physically, mentally and emotionally. I am really proud of myself!
We finally cut a "window" in the wall between the kitchen and the living room and cut a door to have easier access to the storage under the stairs. What a difference these two minor projects have made! Our home feels so much brighter and open with the window. And having access to under the stairs has enabled me to finally declutter my kitchen and organize our food storage. I am so glad we finally did it!
In November M had his tonsils removed. What a champ this kid is. I couldn't believe how brutal it looked in the back of his throat, but he never complained and had a stellar attitude about the whole thing. And now he is sleeping better and hopefully he won't be getting sick as often.
We have 3 new nephews in our family. In April my sister and her husband had their 3rd child and 1st boy, R. This kid is so cute! Lucky for her he is such a good baby and our entire family has really enjoyed having a baby around. In July R's brother and his wife had their first children. Yes, plural, they had twin boys K and S. They are darling! I can't even imagine having twins, but they are handling it all with such an amazing calm. I have been having so much fun with all these babies!
Speaking of babies, R and I decided that we were really, truly done having them. In December we took the plunge and R had the ole snippy snippy. So glad to have that taken care of. He was super grumpy and whiny for a few days, but we survived.
Our boys have become proficient snowboarders this year. It really makes me proud to watch them shreddin' up the slopes!
And to end the year we had a fabulous holiday season. Usually the holidays are stressful and difficult for our family. This year was really pleasant and fun. We spent time with all our favorite people, including my sister L and her husband S who are currently living in Philly. I hope all our future holidays are as great as this one has been.
So that was our year in a nutshell. I'm sure I've missed something important, but this is what has come to mind right now. Tomorrow I will post about my hopes and resolutions for 2009. I've got quite a year planned!
Obama won! I really could not be more optimistic about the direction he wants to take our country in. For so long I have been a little embarrassed by our false bravado, our selfishness, our disregard for the rest of the world, our "bigger is better" mentality, and "Mine! Mine! Mine!" attitude. We finally have earned some respect from the rest of the world and we finally have a rational, intelligent leader who understands the reality we are in and has a plan to begin to rememdy the disasters we have created. I am behind this new administration 100%
R and I came to some agreements on what we needed to do for the health of our family. We have realized where we need some outside help and acquired it, we are making sleep a priority for all of us, we are focusing on wholesome foods, and are being very selective about the quality and quantity of media in our home. I will readily admit that we slip up often, but for the first time I really feel like we are pretty much on the same page with our parenting.
Z started Kindergarten! We are officially past the "pre-schooler" stage. I have really enjoyed moving on to big kid type activities. We went to Lagoon in October and Z pretty much was able to ride everything he wanted to. He is a whiz at math. A dynamo builder and making progress with his reading. He's an absolute sweetheart and loves to help out. He is willing to work hard and is determined to master the skills he associates with being a man. And we finally made significant progress with his encopresis. What a relief that has been for all of us! Z played soccer this year and really is amazing! He just has a natural talent for sports.
M started 3rd grade. So far we really like both his teachers, Mrs. Mitchell for homeroom and Mrs. Olsen for reading. Speaking of reading, M has read 4 Harry Potter books this year as well as 2 Fablehaven books along with a ton of books in between. He has made significant strides with his anxiety and OCD which makes me very proud. He has become very considerate and understands the consequences of his actions. He and his brother have improved their relationship significantly. They still fight like crazy, but there are periods of fun and calm in between. M also received his orange belt in karate and began to take a weapons class. He is really dedicated to his karate lessons and it has been fun to watch him progress.
We got our new kitty Freddy! What an awesome cat! R was so against getting another pet but is just as in love with him as the rest of us. This cat has certainly added some spunk to our house! I am constantly laughing at the stuff this creature does! This brings the total of pets in the family to 4; Pepe our lab, Freddy the kitty, and 2 beta fish.
R had a successful year with his real estate business. It has been a crazy year for the market but R has been solid and committed to following the systems Keller Williams has created for its Realtors and it has paid off. We've seen many agents quit and have somehow managed to soldier on and keep me home with the kids. All in all, his total sales wasn't much lower than last year. Pretty amazing considering the economic meltdown this country has experienced!
I have lost 31 lbs. this year. While much of this I attribute to coming to terms with the fact that I do have ADD and getting the appropriate medication which happens to have the not so horrible side effect of reducing my appetite, I have also improved my diet and done a lot of walking! I feel so much better physically, mentally and emotionally. I am really proud of myself!
We finally cut a "window" in the wall between the kitchen and the living room and cut a door to have easier access to the storage under the stairs. What a difference these two minor projects have made! Our home feels so much brighter and open with the window. And having access to under the stairs has enabled me to finally declutter my kitchen and organize our food storage. I am so glad we finally did it!
In November M had his tonsils removed. What a champ this kid is. I couldn't believe how brutal it looked in the back of his throat, but he never complained and had a stellar attitude about the whole thing. And now he is sleeping better and hopefully he won't be getting sick as often.
We have 3 new nephews in our family. In April my sister and her husband had their 3rd child and 1st boy, R. This kid is so cute! Lucky for her he is such a good baby and our entire family has really enjoyed having a baby around. In July R's brother and his wife had their first children. Yes, plural, they had twin boys K and S. They are darling! I can't even imagine having twins, but they are handling it all with such an amazing calm. I have been having so much fun with all these babies!
Speaking of babies, R and I decided that we were really, truly done having them. In December we took the plunge and R had the ole snippy snippy. So glad to have that taken care of. He was super grumpy and whiny for a few days, but we survived.
Our boys have become proficient snowboarders this year. It really makes me proud to watch them shreddin' up the slopes!
And to end the year we had a fabulous holiday season. Usually the holidays are stressful and difficult for our family. This year was really pleasant and fun. We spent time with all our favorite people, including my sister L and her husband S who are currently living in Philly. I hope all our future holidays are as great as this one has been.
So that was our year in a nutshell. I'm sure I've missed something important, but this is what has come to mind right now. Tomorrow I will post about my hopes and resolutions for 2009. I've got quite a year planned!
11.23.2008
No Spend Challenge Update
Friday morning I decided to take another look through my gift stash and struck gold. I had a stepping stone making kit that would work just great for a girl. I try to not give more "stuff" for gifts, so this also went a long with my gift philosophy. Her mom probably isn't too stoked but that really isn't my problem right? Money saved $15.00.
Friday I washed jeans and found $7 in my pocket! Love that.
Z's birthday party was at McDonalds. When I went to pick him up M requested a chocolate shake. Their shake machine was broken so I ordered a sundae instead. Spent $1.07 from the found money. He didn't eat it and I found it melted a few hours later.
By the end of Friday I was starting to worry that M wasn't going to eat anything at all. Thursday night he had tried a Michelena's Alfredo Lasagna with Broccoli and eaten a bunch. When I asked him what he wanted for dinner he wanted another one of those. So I ran to the store (amazing what a starving child will do for your resolve to spend money). I grabbed 3 plus 2 mac and cheese. I also grabbed 4 Powerades, figuring he'd probably drank a total of 4 oz in the last 24 hours and I was worried about dehydration. I grabbed a pumpkin pie and a package of broccoli cheese soup. Total $23.50.
Saturday my mom called and wondered what she bring M while he was recuperating. I suggested we just head to the bookstore together so I could get something I knew he would like, plus I always buy my kids a few books for Christmas and I wanted to check out the offerings. I found a series that another little boy recommended while I was there. Total $39.51.
Today was a No Spend day. Good for me, I can actually do it.
I need to go fill prescription tomorrow or Tuesday. I can't decide if I should use the one that gives you a $20 GC to Smiths, or the $30 GC to Rite-Aid. I think Smiths is more versatile, but $30 is pretty good. I'll have to think about it overnight.
I am surprised at how hard it is to not spend money. I am realizing I am a convenience shopper. For instance I bought the Christmas books because I don't foresee myself heading to Barnes & Noble again and I didn't want to make a special trip. But I should have checked to see if Costco carries the same series, because if they do and they are cheaper, I will be taking the ones from Barnes & Noble back. Which is an extra trip. Note to self, think things through. It's not like I won't be in the neighborhood in the next month. Observation noted.
I'm hoping by Tuesday or Wednesday M is eating again and a wider range of foods. I don't want to head to the store again. Which reminds me, I should mix up some milk tonight and put it out in the fridge in the garage. Or mix it into the 1/2 gallon we have left to stretch it and mask the taste a bit. I don't foresee needing anything else in the next week, so besides the prescriptions, I should be able to stay out of the store.
Friday I washed jeans and found $7 in my pocket! Love that.
Z's birthday party was at McDonalds. When I went to pick him up M requested a chocolate shake. Their shake machine was broken so I ordered a sundae instead. Spent $1.07 from the found money. He didn't eat it and I found it melted a few hours later.
By the end of Friday I was starting to worry that M wasn't going to eat anything at all. Thursday night he had tried a Michelena's Alfredo Lasagna with Broccoli and eaten a bunch. When I asked him what he wanted for dinner he wanted another one of those. So I ran to the store (amazing what a starving child will do for your resolve to spend money). I grabbed 3 plus 2 mac and cheese. I also grabbed 4 Powerades, figuring he'd probably drank a total of 4 oz in the last 24 hours and I was worried about dehydration. I grabbed a pumpkin pie and a package of broccoli cheese soup. Total $23.50.
Saturday my mom called and wondered what she bring M while he was recuperating. I suggested we just head to the bookstore together so I could get something I knew he would like, plus I always buy my kids a few books for Christmas and I wanted to check out the offerings. I found a series that another little boy recommended while I was there. Total $39.51.
Today was a No Spend day. Good for me, I can actually do it.
I need to go fill prescription tomorrow or Tuesday. I can't decide if I should use the one that gives you a $20 GC to Smiths, or the $30 GC to Rite-Aid. I think Smiths is more versatile, but $30 is pretty good. I'll have to think about it overnight.
I am surprised at how hard it is to not spend money. I am realizing I am a convenience shopper. For instance I bought the Christmas books because I don't foresee myself heading to Barnes & Noble again and I didn't want to make a special trip. But I should have checked to see if Costco carries the same series, because if they do and they are cheaper, I will be taking the ones from Barnes & Noble back. Which is an extra trip. Note to self, think things through. It's not like I won't be in the neighborhood in the next month. Observation noted.
I'm hoping by Tuesday or Wednesday M is eating again and a wider range of foods. I don't want to head to the store again. Which reminds me, I should mix up some milk tonight and put it out in the fridge in the garage. Or mix it into the 1/2 gallon we have left to stretch it and mask the taste a bit. I don't foresee needing anything else in the next week, so besides the prescriptions, I should be able to stay out of the store.
11.20.2008
10 Day No Spending Challenge
A few months ago a couple of blogs I like to read had a No Spending Challenge. I think it was for a month. Since I'm out of money for the month, I'm going to try my own version for the next 10 days.
What We Have
We have A LOT of food on hand. Really more than enough to last for a while. I may need to buy milk. I do have dry milk. Hmmm. I wonder if I could slide it past the boys. I'm going to give it a whirl.
M just had his tonsils out yesterday. The bill won't come for at least 30 days and then I can take 90 days to pay for it all. So nothing should be spent there. I bought his meds yesterday, so they don't count.
Z brought home 2 notes for the Thanksgiving feast on Tuesday. One says to bring a Sweet. The other says to bring a Meat. Not sure which one his teacher really wants, so I'm going with the Meat. I have a ton of pepperoni in the freezer. I'll send that.
Tonight is Bunco. Since I'm not hosting it's free for me.
M can't go out this weekend since he's not supposed to be around people for at least a week. So nothing should be spent.
I paid my car insurance this morning. I had the money saved in an ING sub account. So since it was saved especially for that purpose I'm not counting it.
We don't really have much planned for next week. I need to talk to my mom about Thanksgiving. I'm sure I will need to bring something. I just need to make sure it is something I already have on hand or can make from what we have.
We have 2 FREE coupons for 1 night rentals on RedBox DVDs. Good entertainment for a non-school night.
What I Don't Have
Saturday I have an appointment for some hair removal. I missed the last appointment so I don't really feel I can cancel. Cost $30.
I HAVE to get my oil changed. Soon. Like last month. I think it is usually about $25 at JiffyLube. I have a $10 off coupon. So $15.
I have one prescription that needs to be filled before the end of the month. It's $30 but if I fill it at Smiths I can get a $20 GC.
Z had a birthday party tomorrow. For a girl. I have no gifts stockpiled for girls. I usually spend about $15. If I buy it at Smith's I can use the GC. Cost $0. Love that!
What I'm Deferring
Our cat needs his vaccinations (again. Note: if you don't come back when they tell you to for the next set, you have to start over) so that I can get him fixed. Cat is growing himself quite a set of cajones. So $26 for the shots, $40 for the neuter. $66 to the Humane Society. This can't be deferred past December.
I owe on a library book. $20. I'm going to have to pay this if I want to check out books. But both my boys have cards we can use. I can reasonably defer this until January.
Christmas!
Paint-I am dying to paint my bedroom. We've been here 3 1/2 years and I still have a drab, flat white bedroom. I have the color picked out. And I'm ready to repaint M room a lighter color. So $30-$60 in paint. This, or course, can be deferred indefinitely. I'm thinking I may just ask my folks for cash for Christmas to redo my bedroom.
New Christmas decor. I really want some new stuff. We've had all the same stuff for about 10 years now. I'm going to wait until after Christmas to get some new ornaments on clearance.
What I'm Giving Up
My good friend is having a Girls Night Away this weekend at a hotel. The cost would be about $100. Just not going to happen.
So honestly, I'm in pretty good shape. I just have to do it! I'm actually excited.
What We Have
We have A LOT of food on hand. Really more than enough to last for a while. I may need to buy milk. I do have dry milk. Hmmm. I wonder if I could slide it past the boys. I'm going to give it a whirl.
M just had his tonsils out yesterday. The bill won't come for at least 30 days and then I can take 90 days to pay for it all. So nothing should be spent there. I bought his meds yesterday, so they don't count.
Z brought home 2 notes for the Thanksgiving feast on Tuesday. One says to bring a Sweet. The other says to bring a Meat. Not sure which one his teacher really wants, so I'm going with the Meat. I have a ton of pepperoni in the freezer. I'll send that.
Tonight is Bunco. Since I'm not hosting it's free for me.
M can't go out this weekend since he's not supposed to be around people for at least a week. So nothing should be spent.
I paid my car insurance this morning. I had the money saved in an ING sub account. So since it was saved especially for that purpose I'm not counting it.
We don't really have much planned for next week. I need to talk to my mom about Thanksgiving. I'm sure I will need to bring something. I just need to make sure it is something I already have on hand or can make from what we have.
We have 2 FREE coupons for 1 night rentals on RedBox DVDs. Good entertainment for a non-school night.
What I Don't Have
Saturday I have an appointment for some hair removal. I missed the last appointment so I don't really feel I can cancel. Cost $30.
I HAVE to get my oil changed. Soon. Like last month. I think it is usually about $25 at JiffyLube. I have a $10 off coupon. So $15.
I have one prescription that needs to be filled before the end of the month. It's $30 but if I fill it at Smiths I can get a $20 GC.
Z had a birthday party tomorrow. For a girl. I have no gifts stockpiled for girls. I usually spend about $15. If I buy it at Smith's I can use the GC. Cost $0. Love that!
What I'm Deferring
Our cat needs his vaccinations (again. Note: if you don't come back when they tell you to for the next set, you have to start over) so that I can get him fixed. Cat is growing himself quite a set of cajones. So $26 for the shots, $40 for the neuter. $66 to the Humane Society. This can't be deferred past December.
I owe on a library book. $20. I'm going to have to pay this if I want to check out books. But both my boys have cards we can use. I can reasonably defer this until January.
Christmas!
Paint-I am dying to paint my bedroom. We've been here 3 1/2 years and I still have a drab, flat white bedroom. I have the color picked out. And I'm ready to repaint M room a lighter color. So $30-$60 in paint. This, or course, can be deferred indefinitely. I'm thinking I may just ask my folks for cash for Christmas to redo my bedroom.
New Christmas decor. I really want some new stuff. We've had all the same stuff for about 10 years now. I'm going to wait until after Christmas to get some new ornaments on clearance.
What I'm Giving Up
My good friend is having a Girls Night Away this weekend at a hotel. The cost would be about $100. Just not going to happen.
So honestly, I'm in pretty good shape. I just have to do it! I'm actually excited.
11.13.2008
This and That
It's been awhile. I've been BUSY! So in no particular order here is a bit of this and that from my life.
Philadelphia-I took M to Philly with Nana and Pops to see Aunt L and Uncle Fancypants (aka S). The weather was great. We did the historical stuff the first day and then had the most fantastic banana split at the cutest old fashioned ice cream parlor. The second day we decided to take a double decker bus tour which I have found is a great way to see a lot of a city in a short amount of time. The two most interesting things we saw that day were the Eastern State Penitentiary and the National Geographic exhibit Real Pirates! at the Franklin Institute. Both very cool.
Day 3 was a daytrip to DC. So many cool things. The Smithsonian was amazing and would easily take a week to see everything. My favorite memorial was the Korean War Memorial. I thought it was all really cool though. By the time we returned my ears were actually tired from listening to M talk non-stop for 5 days straight. But we had a lot of fun and I'm glad we had a chance to do this together. And I always love to see L and S. I will be glad when they move back.
Halloween-Thank goodness it was on a Friday this year so it wasn't dragged out all week. What a marathon day though-parade, parties, trick or treat and another party. But they were surprisingly pleasant. Z was Indiana Jones and M was The Unknown Phantom. I am in shock at the amount of candy they brought home. I don't think I ever got that much.
Obama-Oh my hell I am so glad that Obama won. For the first time in a LONG time I don't feel like I'm looking around and wondering what the hell are you people thinking!!! When I watch him speak I am comforted by his calm demeanor, his obvious love for his wife and daughters, his quiet confidence, and his intellect. This is a man who GETS IT! Will life be rosy and wonderful just because he was elected? Obviously not. But having someone in office that is bright, articulate, understands our role in the world, diplomatic and positive is certainly a breath of fresh air. Now WE the American people will have to pay for the mistake of electing Bush and Cheney. It won't be easy, but we have a huge hole to dig ourselves out of. Obama understands that if we don't, our children have no future.
McCain-I didn't hate McCain. Really. A couple of years ago I even said that if another Republican were to be the next president, I hoped it would be him because I respected his integrity and agreed with many of his opinions. Then he decided he wanted to win the election at all costs and his integrity flew right out the window. Not only did he reverse many of his opinions to win the GOPs support, but he chose a VP that in essence is the opposite of everything he stood for, just to get the conservative vote. And the kind of negative campaign he ran against Obama was downright disgusting. Since he threw the inexperience card out the window with Palin, he had to resort to the old GOP favorite tactic, fear. Fortunately most level headed Americans saw it for what it was, desperation. But there are those that it struck a chord with and believe that Obama is a friend of terrorists, a socialist, and too foreign. And those people happen to be the whack jobs that scare me. Using fear as a weapon is the definition of terrorism. Scare people to get what you want. Truly disappointing.
Palin-Yuck. Snarky, bitchy, self-righteous, ignorant, ambitious, power hungy and pretty. A frightening combination. I really hope her 15 minutes are up.
Prop 8-Or as I like to say Prop H8te. It's discrimination pure and simple. You cannot deny a certain segment of the population the same rights that everyone else has. If I can marry whom I choose, then everyone should have the right to marry whomever they choose. You can't take away a gay person's right to procreate. So they already have families. Why not make it a stable, committed family with all the rights other families have? I don't understand why people don't get that. Somebody else's marraige doesn't change my marraige at all. Honestly I don't think it will be long before it is legal. Hopefully sooner than later.
Winter-Already hate it. I hate the decrease in light almost as much as I hate the cold. Sure, I like to snowboard. It's making a bad situation tolerable. But I could give that up with all the rest of winter. I don't need a white Christmas. I would easily give up sweater, sledding, hot cocoa, quilts and a fireplace. I'd rather surf, wear sandals, drink lemonade and soak up the warm, light giving, happy happy sun.
Weight-I'm down to what I thought was my goal. And so of course I've revised that goal and want to lose 5 more. But if I don't, that is OK too. I just don't want to gain it back during the holidays. Now I really need to tone up. I should go to Pilates. But I'm so weak!!! It hurts!! Which means I really need to go. I need new clothes but have no cash. Better than needing bigger clothes right?
Cat-Getting big. Totally psycho and cute at the same time.
Dog-Mellowing out finally. Still cute too.
Homework-Hate, hate, hate. I know they need to do it to learn. It's just such a pain in the butt to have to do it EVERY night. It's too much. It isn't good for household harmony.
Our house-We finally cut a "window" between the living room and kitchen. I love it. It feels very airy and bright now. We also added a door to the storage beneath the stairs making it far more accessable. Now I'm anxious to get the pantry done. And I'd like to paint my bedroom and a couple of the walls in M's room, and get new flooring in the kitchen, and many more projects that we have neither the time or funds for. Someday! I have been decluttering like crazy and organizing and I feel much better about our house now.
Finances-It's not great, but it could be worse. No Costa Rica this year. Such is life.
Twilight-I think Robert Pattinson is hot. I know a lot of women were a little disappointed. He doesn't look like the Edward I had in my mind, but he is pretty perfect. And he can sing too! Pretty dreamy I think. The hair is a little crazy, but we all go through our phases. Not sure I'll see the movie though. I don't want to change the way I think about the books.
So that is what I think about all of that! Agree, disagree, whatever. It's MY blog!
10.06.2008
Girlfriend Weekend-Thanks Bitches!
Each year the women in our mommy play group get together at my parent's cabin at Bear Lake. My sister was the brainchild of this event and I am so glad she thought of it. This year I took my turn at planning the weekend so I decided to invite some other Mommy's In Need of a Break. I only convinced one of the new invitees, Kari, to attend, and I'm so glad she did. She was a great addition to our group. This year our group was the largest yet, 12, which I was excited and worried about at the same time. No worries, it went swimmingly.
I was glad to ride up with Piper. She has been gone for 12 days and we hadn't had time to catch up since she'd been home. I did most the talking though because she has a nasty cold and not much of a voice. It was great to get all my Sara Palin bitching out!!
We stayed up LATE the first night laughing and telling stories. I won't repeat any of the hilarious stories and conversations, but OMG. I hang out with the funniest people!
The next day many of us slept in to catch up on much needed sleep. One of the things I love most about this weekend is the flexibility. Everyone is totally content to do their own thing and let everyone else do theirs. The weather decided we weren't going to have any beach time this year. It rained and rained and rained. Which was actually very peaceful and made the landscape really beautiful. Some brave souls headed out for a walk despite the downpour while the rest of us had a lazy morning of lounging and eating Sara and Mandy's delish breakfast of homemade zucchini bread and fresh fruit. Sooo good. Then our resident Pilates instructor Piper led us in an ab destroying, butt burning session. My abs are still groaning, I need to go to some of her classes on a regular basis. Lunch was a delish duo of salads by Piper (who, my son Myles will gratuitously tell random people, is a FANTASTIC chef). The afternoon consisted of napping, reading, scrapbooking, snacking, and, of course, more wonderful conversation. Piper, Sara, Kelli and I played a round of Balderdash. I'm good at writing false definitions, and I won, but I must say I suck royally at the strategic aspect of the game. I lost track of the times Piper rolled her eyes at me! LOL. It was really fun. And I don't usually love games.
Kari gave me the most fabulous session of acupressure. I learned that the reason I am always so stiff and knotted on the right side is that is is my masculine side, which is your doing, logical, practical side. Apparently, I'm not as comfortable, or confident with that aspect of myself, so I strain and end up holding on to the tension in my neck and back on the right side. When she told me that I knew she was absolutely correct and impressed with her intuition.
For dinner we had Keri's and Patrice's fantastic dinner of enchiladas and spanish rice. Oh how I love good food. Thank goodness there was no shortage of that! We stayed up to talk some more and watched the Sex in the City movie. I never got into the series, so I'm sure I missed a lot of the details and connections, but I still enjoyed it. Made me realize that I don't want to be Miranda. I need to pay more attention to my man. I stayed up to read a bit because I am totally and embarassingly addicted to the Twilight books. One word, Edward. 'Nuff said.
Sunday was a spectacular day, overcast and breezy with crisp, sweet air. The lake was deep blue and sparkled. If I knew I had one month to live, I'd just head right up to Bear Lake. It is far and away my favorite place on earth. More home to me than my parent's house. My happy place.
Piper headed out early for a social obligation. The rest of us ate my breakfast, that Sara so generously prepared for me because I couldn't get my lazy ass out of bed. Cinnamon Apple Oven Pancake. It was good. Then more of the same wonderful easy going lounging around. Lunch was Angie's Sweet potato Sausage Leek casserole. My mom started making this for Thanksgiving instead of the usual candied sweet potatoes (which none of us liked ) when I was teenage. Even my husband, who doesn't love sweet potatoes, agrees it is fabulous. Poor Jenny made a huge pot of soup, got distracted and had to throw it out because it scorched. Poor us too. I love her soup.
Ang decided to leave early and once she started packing up, everyone else did too. I wasn't at all ready to come home, but we cleaned up and took off about 3. I really enjoyed the ride home with Jaymison, Jenny and Kari. When I got home the fam damily wasn't here, and I decided to take advantage of the peace for as long as it lasted.
Then, in door came my two balls of energy. I'm so glad they were as happy to see me as I was them. R did a fantastic job this weekend. House clean, meals made, snowbird season pass pictures taken, sleep schedule maintained, playdates with friends, and happy kids on top of all that. Maybe he should be the stay at home parent. He really did do a great job. I'm a lucky woman.
Such a great weekend. I look forward to it all year and I can't believe it flew by so fast. I wish we could go up for a week! I don't know what I am going to do when Z starts 1st grade and I don't have a kid to take to play group. Seriously, I don't know what I will do without my weekly social hour. I have such great friends!!
I was glad to ride up with Piper. She has been gone for 12 days and we hadn't had time to catch up since she'd been home. I did most the talking though because she has a nasty cold and not much of a voice. It was great to get all my Sara Palin bitching out!!
We stayed up LATE the first night laughing and telling stories. I won't repeat any of the hilarious stories and conversations, but OMG. I hang out with the funniest people!
The next day many of us slept in to catch up on much needed sleep. One of the things I love most about this weekend is the flexibility. Everyone is totally content to do their own thing and let everyone else do theirs. The weather decided we weren't going to have any beach time this year. It rained and rained and rained. Which was actually very peaceful and made the landscape really beautiful. Some brave souls headed out for a walk despite the downpour while the rest of us had a lazy morning of lounging and eating Sara and Mandy's delish breakfast of homemade zucchini bread and fresh fruit. Sooo good. Then our resident Pilates instructor Piper led us in an ab destroying, butt burning session. My abs are still groaning, I need to go to some of her classes on a regular basis. Lunch was a delish duo of salads by Piper (who, my son Myles will gratuitously tell random people, is a FANTASTIC chef). The afternoon consisted of napping, reading, scrapbooking, snacking, and, of course, more wonderful conversation. Piper, Sara, Kelli and I played a round of Balderdash. I'm good at writing false definitions, and I won, but I must say I suck royally at the strategic aspect of the game. I lost track of the times Piper rolled her eyes at me! LOL. It was really fun. And I don't usually love games.
Kari gave me the most fabulous session of acupressure. I learned that the reason I am always so stiff and knotted on the right side is that is is my masculine side, which is your doing, logical, practical side. Apparently, I'm not as comfortable, or confident with that aspect of myself, so I strain and end up holding on to the tension in my neck and back on the right side. When she told me that I knew she was absolutely correct and impressed with her intuition.
For dinner we had Keri's and Patrice's fantastic dinner of enchiladas and spanish rice. Oh how I love good food. Thank goodness there was no shortage of that! We stayed up to talk some more and watched the Sex in the City movie. I never got into the series, so I'm sure I missed a lot of the details and connections, but I still enjoyed it. Made me realize that I don't want to be Miranda. I need to pay more attention to my man. I stayed up to read a bit because I am totally and embarassingly addicted to the Twilight books. One word, Edward. 'Nuff said.
Sunday was a spectacular day, overcast and breezy with crisp, sweet air. The lake was deep blue and sparkled. If I knew I had one month to live, I'd just head right up to Bear Lake. It is far and away my favorite place on earth. More home to me than my parent's house. My happy place.
Piper headed out early for a social obligation. The rest of us ate my breakfast, that Sara so generously prepared for me because I couldn't get my lazy ass out of bed. Cinnamon Apple Oven Pancake. It was good. Then more of the same wonderful easy going lounging around. Lunch was Angie's Sweet potato Sausage Leek casserole. My mom started making this for Thanksgiving instead of the usual candied sweet potatoes (which none of us liked ) when I was teenage. Even my husband, who doesn't love sweet potatoes, agrees it is fabulous. Poor Jenny made a huge pot of soup, got distracted and had to throw it out because it scorched. Poor us too. I love her soup.
Ang decided to leave early and once she started packing up, everyone else did too. I wasn't at all ready to come home, but we cleaned up and took off about 3. I really enjoyed the ride home with Jaymison, Jenny and Kari. When I got home the fam damily wasn't here, and I decided to take advantage of the peace for as long as it lasted.
Then, in door came my two balls of energy. I'm so glad they were as happy to see me as I was them. R did a fantastic job this weekend. House clean, meals made, snowbird season pass pictures taken, sleep schedule maintained, playdates with friends, and happy kids on top of all that. Maybe he should be the stay at home parent. He really did do a great job. I'm a lucky woman.
Such a great weekend. I look forward to it all year and I can't believe it flew by so fast. I wish we could go up for a week! I don't know what I am going to do when Z starts 1st grade and I don't have a kid to take to play group. Seriously, I don't know what I will do without my weekly social hour. I have such great friends!!
9.20.2008
Fun with Childhood illnesses
Two weeks ago Friday, M went to the pediatrician for his well-child check. All good except that his tonsils are huge. They always have been but this time his ped wanted him to go see an ENT to look at them. Since our deductible is HUGE, I put it off.
Two weeks ago Sataurday, Z came down with an obvious classic case of strep. Fever. Sore throat. Big nap on a Saturday. So down to the express care for a culture and a course of amoxicillan.
I kept waiting for M to get it because he always does when it's going around. But two weeks pass and I began to think we had managed to dodge it this time. I finally schedule an appointment with the ENT for Friday (yesterday) because M has been stuffy, but not obviously sick, for about a month. I figured it was allergies (praying it's dust and pollan and not the cat), but since he needed to have his tonsils checked out anyway, I figured I'd just bite the bullet and get it all checked out.
Thursday M wakes up and says "My throat feels weird". I ask if it hurts-no, not really. Does it hurt when you swallow? No, just feels weird. I take his temp-normal. He eats breakfast and heads to school. About 11:30 I get a call because he forgot his library book. I ask if his throat still feels weird. Yep, but it doesn't hurt. I make the executive decision to pull him out of school and go get him tested for strep. I check the back of his throat, bright red and patchy. Another trip to the express care, another positive culture, another round of amoxicillan. And to top it off, two ear infections brewing. Nice. And all he says is his throat feels weird.
Dr. says he's fine for school the next day, so off he goes. But today he's added a major gooey nose. I pick him up early and head to the ENT. He takes one look at his tonsils and says, schedule the surgery, sooner than later. Not only will it help him not get strep 2-3 times every year, but he should sleep a whole lot better and that should help his anxiety level come down a bit. And by the way, he has chronic sinitis, not allergies, which the amoxicillan won't touch. So another trip to the pharmacy, a new antibiotic, and I've dropped over $200 on strep throat this month. Ouch!
So I'm trying to figure out the best time to take little Einstein out of school for 10 days. He was initially freaking out about the idea of surgery, but the promise of 10 days of no school, TV, Playstation and ice cream seems to have comforted him quite a bit. Plus a friend at school told him that it really wasn't that bad. I'm thinking the week before Thanksgiving because those two weeks are a joke anyway with all the short days and days off.
I don't even want to know what the surgery will cost. We may actually meet our deductible this year. At least it's tax deductible, right?
Two weeks ago Sataurday, Z came down with an obvious classic case of strep. Fever. Sore throat. Big nap on a Saturday. So down to the express care for a culture and a course of amoxicillan.
I kept waiting for M to get it because he always does when it's going around. But two weeks pass and I began to think we had managed to dodge it this time. I finally schedule an appointment with the ENT for Friday (yesterday) because M has been stuffy, but not obviously sick, for about a month. I figured it was allergies (praying it's dust and pollan and not the cat), but since he needed to have his tonsils checked out anyway, I figured I'd just bite the bullet and get it all checked out.
Thursday M wakes up and says "My throat feels weird". I ask if it hurts-no, not really. Does it hurt when you swallow? No, just feels weird. I take his temp-normal. He eats breakfast and heads to school. About 11:30 I get a call because he forgot his library book. I ask if his throat still feels weird. Yep, but it doesn't hurt. I make the executive decision to pull him out of school and go get him tested for strep. I check the back of his throat, bright red and patchy. Another trip to the express care, another positive culture, another round of amoxicillan. And to top it off, two ear infections brewing. Nice. And all he says is his throat feels weird.
Dr. says he's fine for school the next day, so off he goes. But today he's added a major gooey nose. I pick him up early and head to the ENT. He takes one look at his tonsils and says, schedule the surgery, sooner than later. Not only will it help him not get strep 2-3 times every year, but he should sleep a whole lot better and that should help his anxiety level come down a bit. And by the way, he has chronic sinitis, not allergies, which the amoxicillan won't touch. So another trip to the pharmacy, a new antibiotic, and I've dropped over $200 on strep throat this month. Ouch!
So I'm trying to figure out the best time to take little Einstein out of school for 10 days. He was initially freaking out about the idea of surgery, but the promise of 10 days of no school, TV, Playstation and ice cream seems to have comforted him quite a bit. Plus a friend at school told him that it really wasn't that bad. I'm thinking the week before Thanksgiving because those two weeks are a joke anyway with all the short days and days off.
I don't even want to know what the surgery will cost. We may actually meet our deductible this year. At least it's tax deductible, right?
9.08.2008
Discipline
So R and I have decided that we really do need to be on the same page for discipline at our house. M has gotten quite mouthy and argumentative. Z is more passive-agressive and just ignores me and does whatever he wants anyway. He's also very sneaky and prone to lying a bit. When it comes to discipline, I'm the softy, the slacker. I just want peace. R is the toughy, the yeller. He doesn't want to be embarassed or inconvenienced. One day M told us that he wished we were more like his teacher from last year, Mrs. Jones. He felt like she was strict, but nice. Firm, but fair. Well, there's nothing like your kid telling you to get your act together.
We have picked the book "How to Behave So Your Kids Will Too" by Sal Severe. What an awesome book. Exactly the mix between giving kid's power and responsibility relative to their age and actions, and the parent's having the authority that is needed in a family. We have started some of the recommendations immediately while we work through the book together.
Yesterday was our first day with our new time-out rules. It was so unbelievable difficult to stay committed when your child is in total meltdown. But we did, and the difference it is already making is pretty unbelievable. M only needed one time-out, but it took a long time for him to stop arguing and muttering so that we could actually start the time. Z also had an extremely long time-out because he wouldn't stay put. But we made it through.
The rest of the day M was rather quiet, which always worries me. But he was also amazingly compliant and cooperative. We went for a hike in the afternoon, which he usually will complain about before, during and after. Yesterday he actually enjoyed the hike, and told us so several times. At the end we realized we had locked our keys in the car. R was grumpy and short for a few minutes. M just played quietly while we waited for the locksmith to unlock the car. Before bed we talked and worked out any lingering bad feelings. He also mentioned he thought he handled the locked car more maturely than R. I laughed and had to agree. He felt really proud of himself. He fell right asleep. Today he asked me to please help him work through an argument with Z. Amazing!
Z is still testing to see if we are serious. We had another time-out today that took about 20 minutes total. He just won't stop trying to get "one more chance". But I have also given him several warnings today that he is headed towards a bad decision, and he has quickly corrected his behavior. He's pretty bull-headed, so it may take a little longer with him.
All in all, we have had two really pleasant days. I haven't had to yell or threaten or feel upset that I'm being ignored. The boys are playing together well and doing what they are asked to do with minimal protest. I am really excited about the book and the progress. Now I just have to stay consistent, which is always the hard part for me. But it helps to have R on board and the two of us working toward the same goal.
We have picked the book "How to Behave So Your Kids Will Too" by Sal Severe. What an awesome book. Exactly the mix between giving kid's power and responsibility relative to their age and actions, and the parent's having the authority that is needed in a family. We have started some of the recommendations immediately while we work through the book together.
Yesterday was our first day with our new time-out rules. It was so unbelievable difficult to stay committed when your child is in total meltdown. But we did, and the difference it is already making is pretty unbelievable. M only needed one time-out, but it took a long time for him to stop arguing and muttering so that we could actually start the time. Z also had an extremely long time-out because he wouldn't stay put. But we made it through.
The rest of the day M was rather quiet, which always worries me. But he was also amazingly compliant and cooperative. We went for a hike in the afternoon, which he usually will complain about before, during and after. Yesterday he actually enjoyed the hike, and told us so several times. At the end we realized we had locked our keys in the car. R was grumpy and short for a few minutes. M just played quietly while we waited for the locksmith to unlock the car. Before bed we talked and worked out any lingering bad feelings. He also mentioned he thought he handled the locked car more maturely than R. I laughed and had to agree. He felt really proud of himself. He fell right asleep. Today he asked me to please help him work through an argument with Z. Amazing!
Z is still testing to see if we are serious. We had another time-out today that took about 20 minutes total. He just won't stop trying to get "one more chance". But I have also given him several warnings today that he is headed towards a bad decision, and he has quickly corrected his behavior. He's pretty bull-headed, so it may take a little longer with him.
All in all, we have had two really pleasant days. I haven't had to yell or threaten or feel upset that I'm being ignored. The boys are playing together well and doing what they are asked to do with minimal protest. I am really excited about the book and the progress. Now I just have to stay consistent, which is always the hard part for me. But it helps to have R on board and the two of us working toward the same goal.
8.27.2008
School has Started!!!
Well, Summer is over. It's official and I'm having mixed feelings.
M started back Monday. He likes his teacher so far. He isn't too stoked on who is in his class this year, but is old enough to realize that it doesn't change who he chooses to play with at recess. I peeked in yesterday and they were doing yoga after working on their reading. His teacher is an old hippie. I think we are going to get a long just fine. He is walking most of the way with some friends which makes him feel so grown up and simplifies mornings. And dad can leave for work whenever he wants without making us all crazy because he doesn't want to be late. But homework, oh the dreaded homework. Finishing his Summer Math packet was P-U-R-E H-E-L-L!!!! I have rarely disliked my own child sooo much. I'm positive the sentiment was exactly the same on his end. NOT FUN! But it's done. And so, I have instituted a few new rules at our house. I hate rules, because I have to enforce them, and because I hate following them myself. But sometimes I see the necessary in their evil. So #1 No TV or Playstation until after homework. I'm not going to nag, but it's his choice to miss those activities if he procrastinates all day and evening. And #2 We are going to do something each day even if he doesn't have an assignment due. We are renaming homework time, enrichment time instead. So at a minimum he needs to go over his math flashcards with me once and read for 20 minutes and practice his handwriting for 10 minutes. Did he love that yesterday. Oh, no. No he did not. But he did it. And I think he'll get used to it. My goal for him this year is to learn to work, and perservere, and quit being a lazy, whiny, you know what.
Poor Z, he doesn't start for a week. And he has decided he is ready! He asks everyday if today is finally the day. We had a picnic in the park with his classmates yesterday and his new teacher. It was great. His teacher is really just the most perfect Kindergarten teacher ever. I am really excited for him. I'm sure I'll tear up on his first day, but for now, I can't wait for him to go too.
I have volunteered to be copy mom and assignment correcter in M class. For Z I am doing Junior Achievement once a month. I am also considering being the assistant Den Mother for cub scouts. Am I crazy? Obviously, but I think I need to be more involved. So we will see how that goes.
R mentioned hiring someone to do what I've been doing at work with him. Sounds kind of nice, but I hate to pay someone to do it when I am perfectly capable and can find the time. Not sure if he was serious, but I may take him up on it.
M and I are going to visit L and S in Philly at the end of the month. I'm really excited. I'm trying to figure out how long I can leave R with Z without it being really hard, and how long we need to go to see everything I'd like to while we are there. It promises to be interesting, that is for sure.
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